Wonders of History (Remus/Nayru C )

[Nayru Al-Saiduq]

"...Close enough." Nayru grinned with all the art and guile of a golden retriever at Amelia's ongoing antics, not having the heart to correct her. It was adorable in its own right, less foolishness or stupidity so much as naivete that she herself had proven she was not above in the past.

Remus's comment was more accurate than he could ever know - she seemed to have a truly impressive talent to accidentally run into bad dudes with stabby things. "I only wish I could take credit for it. Being a wandering hero of justice, hunting down evil in all its forms, sounds like a fun job - but instead I just run into trouble whenever I don't want to. Kind of ironic really." Amelia piped back in before the conversation could go much of anywhere else, which was proving to be a bit of an issue in terms of the higher-level conversations they had been holding, but perhaps not a real problem considering that these sillier conversations were fine too.

She wasn't really sure what the answer was, and Nayru's hesitation was evident for a second as she raced to come up with an actual response. Enjoyed? She didn't practice martial arts, or kama, because she enjoyed it. The weapon was as much because of her promise to Veigue, and the martial arts had just been a curio that proved to be useful later. It was true that she had realized she was starting to enjoy this whole training thing a bit, though, albeit not necessarily the individual parts of it... but Nayru wasn't entirely adverse to the concept of enjoying fighting, she just didn't know how to react to it, or even how to gauge if she really did. It was all fun and games to train with Veigue, but the assassins hounding him only seemed to be getting stronger and stronger, and the mysterious man in the shadows had yet to make his appearance.

WELP she wasn't really getting anywhere with this. The Nabatan woman still didn't really have an answer, per se, but that just meant she'd have to wing it. "Martial arts are more - natural to me. Using forged weapons is putting a strange and alien barrier between my own abilities and the enemy. But sometimes... a weapon can have more meaning to it than simply how you kill with it, but why you use it, and on whom."

[Remus]

Amelia was beaming once more. Every compliment or affirmation she received from Nayru seemed to further bolster her already unwavering sense of self. Not even Elimine would be able to save Remus in the coming years it would seem, as the girl developed into a larger scope and mindset. The small raven haired girl excitedly nodded in an almost wild fashion, her onyx strands dancing about in a rather disheveled mess fitting of that one might associate with an orphan. The priest who shouldered this burden, literally as well as figuratively, looked to the girl upon his shoulders as she listened to Nayru comment about the hunting down of evil; for the priest could only imagine the fantastic images the young excitable girl conjured up within her mind.

Before he could comment, Amelia had chimed in again and kept Nayru on the defensive with another round of thousand questions. While Remus felt the smallest touch of jovial sympathy for Nayru, whom Amelia assailed with every question that came to her mind, he couldn't fault the young girl; he himself after all had almost if not more questions which he had plied prior. Albeit their conversations were more philosophical or ones that discussed the state of the world, but to a young mind like Amelia, was there really any difference between philosophy and punching people? He couldn't imagine so. However Nayru's explanation it would seem had delved a bit into the realm of philosophical thought, or at-least danced upon it with the emphasis on morals behind using a weapon. Surprisingly, the blue haired priest was happy to hear Nayru say such things, as it could draw on Amelia to think of such things. Perhaps it would derive a thought provoking chain of moments for Amelia. It would certainly be a nice change of-

"So if you used your weapons on bad guys you could punch them and hit them with your karma things? That's really really really cool!"

Annnnnd yup. Remus shook his head a little bit, more out of exasperation than disappointment. He couldn't count himself surprised in the end after all. Such was life though, wasn't it?

Remus looked up at Amelia from the shifted angle with her still sitting behind his head on his shoulders as he did the least he could as parental figure. Corrected a small knit picky thing. "It's Kama, Amelia, not karma."

"Same thing!!"

The priest shook his head a little bit once more in exasperation. A small chuckle and soft smile belittled the gesture though. Perhaps it was best to just let the conversation continue.

[Nayru Al-Saiduq]

Nayru crossed her arms with a smile persistently tugging at the corner of her lips - while Amelia had missed the point to a truly impressive degree, it was difficult to exactly get mad at her, and it wasn't like this was a proper lecture anyways, was it now? "Something like that. Many martial art styles exalt specific weapons as extensions of the body, and train both barehanded and using those weapons to work them into the style. My formal training didn't include what I'm trying to do now, exactly, but it taught me basics to work off of. Instincts and practice have taken me from there."

Granted, 'there' and 'here' were still a bit nebulous, and 'here' was still a pretty long distance from where she wanted to be. Nayru had plenty of issues, but overestimating herself was not common among them, she thought, and she was under no delusions about her being a transcendent master of the blade - Veigue alone had trained for years longer than her and was certainly far better with his sword, and there were unquestionably mortal warriors who could eclipse both of them combined in skill and experience with their chosen weapons.

She had been getting used to being the big fish - but it was always a reminder that there were bigger frickin' laser sharks in the ocean. Or, uh, however that saying went. Nayru was pretty sure she nailed it though. She was... also pretty sure that Amelia had missed her comment entirely, and while she didn't mind talking about weapons forever, she didn't necessarily want Amelia to miss all reference to the darker side of murder - phenomenal cosmic powers and supreme mastery of the blade aside, it was just as easy to use that power for evil as for good, the former being perhaps far easier in fact. While Amelia had a good upbringing and mentor thanks to Remus...

He had seemed happy enough to stay out of the conversation so far, but Nayru felt she might need a little backup to ground the discussion in responsibility. It wasn't exactly her strong suit, after all, even at the best of times, and sometimes the greatest responsibility of all was knowing when to bring in the big... ballistae? Hm. That metaphor probably needed some work. If only there was a weapon more powerful, louder, and imposing than a ballista.... oh well, humans would invent it sooner or later, and she'd take preemptive credit for whatever saying it ended up being.

"How do you feel about the macabre arts, Remus?" She looked up at him, abruptly dragging him kicking and screaming into the forefront of the battlefield. In a manner of speaking, of course, not, like, literally. There was subtle amusement in her voice, a sort of tacit admission that she was having just a hint more fun with this, and such an open-ended and yet pointy question, than she probably should. "Have you a blade concealed within your doublet, or some sage wisdom to share with brave Amelia here before she enters life as a... conceptual assassin?" Okay, at that point her smile had moved on to being a completely crap-eating grin, despite her best and ongoing efforts.

[Remus]

It could have been worse. Being thrown into the maw of the active volcano now known as Ostia for example might have been a bit worse than being thrown under the carriage as Nayru had just done. Just barely. He however was not entirely surprised. Between the dynamic duo of Amelia and Nayru, he was fairly certain it would have only been a matter of time till he was dragged into the conversation. Remus chuckled once more, before shaking his head and looking towards Nayru in response. The choice of the word conceptual had done nothing but give Amelia the now unwavering standpoint that she was in fact, entirely correct on all things ever. Children naturally were clearly so wise. The blue haired priest however shifted his musing to words and not just gestures or gazes as Amelia tugged lightly at his hair to adjust herself on his shoulders.

"Ah..well..no. I've no hidden weapons. I honestly doubt I could very much hurt someone even if I swung my staff wtih all my might. I confess I'm not much of a fighter as you already know very well! Haha...as for wisdom about assassins and what not? What Nayru, and Amelia...I'd say..don't be one! Simple as that. It's such a dangerous thing..and very dark. You'd be far safer being something nice like a cook. Though if you don't like cooking, I'm sure there are hundreds of safe things you could chose as a job Amelia, when your older of course."

He didn't have to look to know she was pouting. He knew the little girl well enough. Her future career however to her, seemed to be set in stone. As she exclaimed not a second later. "You don't gotta worry about that! I won't be an assassin. I'm going to be empress of the Amelian empire and rule all of elibe! My army will keep people safe so no one will have to kill each-other! If they don't, then my dragons will eat them!!"

Another charming thought. Amelia commanding not just an empire, but dragons? Wonderful. Remus was suddenly quite thankful that a reality such as that couldn't come to pass. Remus chuckled however at the girl's bold claims to total conquest before chiming in once more.

"With you riding a dragon into battle no doubt, right?"

Amelia nodded happily before swinging her arms a bit in excitement.

"And you and miss Nayru riding dragons into battle too! And owain!"

Another chuckle left the blue haired priest as he gestured towards Nayru and then himself before chiming in. "Miss Nayru may be able to handle that..but I don't think I could very well ride a dragon Amelia. I don't think I'd have that in me haha..you think up such imaginative storys though."

[Nayru Al-Saiduq]

"Well, empress is definitely more respectable than assassin, wouldn't you say, Remus?" If her smile grew any larger it would threaten to consume her head entire within that grisly maw, but for now Nayru managed to keep it from eating her head. "Won't you support your dearest Amelia in her aspirations of a better world? I can hardly imagine the cruelty and depravity of a man who could not even bear to consider such a... well-meaning young... maiden's... dreams!"

Nayru considered vomiting, it seemed the most appropriate way to react to the absolute stupidity she was spewing, but there was something primal - natural - about children ganging up on their elders, and despite the incredible irony of the situation, she had entered the fray on the side of the Amelian Empire. This talk of dragons was amusing as well, though she couldn't help but wonder if it was a bit dangerous... while most of Elibe believed dragons dead and gone, Nayru suspected that the ruling classes of the dominant nations of Elibe knew better, and with the aura of fear slowly overtaking Elibe, it was possible that such free talk of dragons might have negative repercussions for Remus.

...Or not. She was probably overthinking it. Certainly Amelia didn't have to worry about being found out to be one of the 'monsters' of the Scouring, and last times he checked neither did Remus, so at worst they would probably just be questioned by overzealous Etrurian security and then set loose when it all turned out to be a misunderstanding. But who knew? Still, it wasn't exactly her place to decree what they were allowed to speak of, and so Nayru held her tongue on the subject despite some misgivings and moved to rejoin the conversation as if nothing had happened. "Well, I can't say as that I'm an expert on the art of dragon riding, but I'm sure if you dangled a pegasus on a stick in front of one, you could probably get a willing mount from even the proudest dragon."

Her? Hate pegasi? That would just be silly!

[Remus]

The shaggy haired priest chuckled as Nayru once more dragged him under the carriage. He was sure lucky to have a friend willing to ensure that he didn't survive the first pass of bumping wheels, wasn't he? Such dedication was the sure sign that she truly cared. Amelia was grinning ear to ear as Nayru complimented her choice of career path. The girl's excited bouncing upon Remuses shoulders made this even more evident while he maintained a hand upon her knee to keep her from tumbling off, though in part he felt the soreness from having the young girl sitting upon them for so long starting to amount to something. His gaze directed to Nayru, the smile on his face still lingering even as he was ganged up upon, knowing it was all in good fun.

Though he did find the notion of attempting to dangle a pegasus upon a stick rather disturbing. Spoke up after turning aside the thoughts of Amelia's future empire and that of the dragon riding army she wished to some day am mount to commanding.

"Amelia. I'm going to have to put you down for a bit. My shoulders are getting a bit sore. You can walk next to Miss Nayru though."

He slowly paused, and shifted the girl off his shoulders so that she could walk between the two adults. As he rolled his shoulders briefly, he felt the bones pop and crack quietly while he rotated his neck a bit to stretch it out. Feeling much better now that the tiny burden of Amelia upon his back was no longer present, he started to walk once more; even as the raven haired girl took his other hand. He looked towards the road for a moment before pondering allowed, despite the somewhat inappropriate nature of the question. "I wonder..do you think Dragon's actually did eat Pegasi? "

[Nayru Al-Saiduq]

"Of course dragons would eat them," Nayru responded matter of factly, almost immediately. "They're just dumb flying horses, that are dumb," just in case the first repetition wasn't clear enough, "but with egos to match the collective of every dragon in history. In fact, the Scouring was probably actually a war about Pegasus eating rights that humans re-purposed after the fact so their Pegasi masters would seem blameless in their duplicitous betrayal of all things good and right with the world."

The strange twilight zone of the disparity between the dragon's words and tone only grew as she spoke, but she seemed entirely unaware of it - though whether that was because Nayru actually didn't notice, or because she was screwing with Remus on a level that transcended mortality and reality itself, was difficult to say. Certainly she gave no outward indication of which possibility was more likely.

"Even today, the vile monsters hide beneath a guise of docility and servitude, waiting for their chance to rise against their human 'overlords' and crush them as thoroughly as they once duped humanity into doing to poor innocent dragons who just wanted dinner. Think of the children, Remus - how will Amelia build her conceptual empire if she is under the cruel diamond hooves of humanity's new overlords, forced to slave away in their stables for all eternity?"

Yeah... probably busted with the conceptual thing, but it had been a good run. She could rest in peace, or possibly in pieces, when Remus finally snapped and murdered everyone.

[Remus]

At first, he thought Nayru was inserting some Scholarly opinion that she'd dredged up from various sources compiled or cross referenced with historical text or some indication in another ruin. Despite the growing lunacy that it sounded, Remus bought into this story far longer, he feared, than most should have. Did Nayru personally hate Pegasi? Was she shifting her dislike towards them as she tried to imply these horrible things? Remus gave her the benefit of the doubt, until she mentioned that key word. Until he heard the word "conceptual."

He lost all ability to take her serious back then. That she was able to say that with a straight face, in light of such a subject. Remus started laughing as he shook his head in un-hidden mock-disappointment. He gazed at her for a moment before waggling a finger scoldingly towards her, grinning as he did so. No one could ever claim Nayru was devoid of humor. Infact, he had to admit that he found that somewhat special about her; in a genuine way. She was carefree at the most opportune moments. Sure, as she had conveyed she had worries, and likely even doubts. However despite this, she seemed to harbor a sense of freedom that he had yet seen in any adult. Perhaps that observation was all in his head though.

"I hardly believe that Dragons would wage a war to wipe our Pegasus. I doubt any dragon ever disliked them so much that it would justifiably do that. Nor do I believe that the pegasi, though I've never seen one, would be able to perform such tasks. If they can? Well maybe they just very well deserve ruling then!"

[Nayru Al-Saiduq]

Nayru joined Remus in laughter when he finally broke down, her own self control vanishing in the face of his amusement and her vile(?) deception(?) falling apart like a house of cards. Her merriment was perhaps more reserved than his, quiet giggling from behind the newly raised hand that hid her expression, but no less genuine and childlike for it. Not quite childish but not too far away in some ways.

Outside of the blatantly obvious goal of screwing with Remus, she had done it intentionally on another level, one masked by the more obvious reasoning. Nayru wasn't quite blind enough to what Remus had gone through recently, especially given his sheltered life, and he had just nearly escaped death. While she didn't know him personally well enough to be sure, she did know humans well enough to know that something like that wasn't easy to just forget immediately, and while opeen sympathy and "hey want to talk about it" wasn't really her style, she was trying to help in her own way, albeit in an indirect and somewhat circuitous fashion.

Nayru herself didn't really realize it but it was in many ways an odd combination of the hard-earned maturity she had been slowly cultivating in her previous life and the childlike immaturity of the her she had so recently regained. As for how well it would work - well, that was up to Remus. But she did feel a fair degree of responsibility for his plight; even if it wasn't her fault per se, she couldn't really just ignore it either.

...But she also couldn't accept or allow the kind of blasphemous word-things spewing from his hateful mouth.

"You'll see someday when those fluffy white atrocities turn on you. You'll all see", she muttered, once again in the uncanny valley of it not being especially clear if she was actually batshit insane or just screwing with him. And why did there have to be an actual answer to that? Sometimes the world was more interesting when the 'truth' was simply a matter of perception.

[Remus]

It certainly was pleasant. That he could laugh, and enjoy laughing with Nayru, despite all that had transpired over the past full day. How much of it was simply Nayru humoring him however left him secretly skeptical. It in no way belittled how pleasant it was to be in her company though. Remus shifted his staff slightly so that he could easier use it to shift some weight onto as if it was a walking stick. With Amelia no longer weighing down his shoulders, he felt better at ease to take full strides. That did a bit more justice to his "priestly" look. As opposed to the...bloodied holes..and dried blood stains...yeah...he would need new robes at some point. Luckily at-least he had the brown traveling robe to cover his body. He shuddered as he imagined what he looked like beneath that robe though; atleast from a perspective of someone seeing a priest with a torn up robe and brutalized slash marks along the fabric; not to mention the dried blood somewhat consistent to his person.

The priest shifted his gaze to Nayru once more before he chuckled and tilted his head. He shrugged a bit before looking at her with a grin on his mug, nodding before looking back to the path ahead. "So..Nayru. While I realize I'm overly curious to a most terrible degree, I can't help but wonder. Have you been involved in much heavy fighting..orr? I realize that question may seem silly given your displayed prowess, but you seemed to act so..instinctively. As if you needn't think of your foes poise or danger they might pose. I hope I'm not delving too personally. "

[Nayru Al-Saiduq]

Instinctively, hm? Remus's question was at once both quickly obvious to her but difficult to actually explain, leaving Nayru in a somewhat awkward position. Not an uncomfortable one per se, she didn't really mind the question, but the realities of her situation and the intricacies of the truth did not lend themselves well to a quick and easy answer.

The short version was that her combat prowess, as far as she understood it, came from two main sources; her limited real-world combat experience, which had grown by leaps and bounds lately but was still not especially impressive even by human standards, much less in the eyes of a warrior who had stood the test of a thousand years of unending war; and there was her instinctive understanding of combat - a so-called 'racial memory' that all dragons possessed to some degree or another, the ability and understanding that they were the most naturally destructive forces in Elibe. Dragon. A word with many meanings, most negative these days, but synonymous with terror, with fear, with powerthat could not be denied.

She... wasn't exactly as impressive as a normal dragon, and her connection to her abilities had always felt subtly different from what she had gathered 'normal' dragons felt, but if there was one thing she had a natural affinity for, it was the art of - no, there was nothing artistic about it, she corrected herself mid-thought. She was good at killing. There was no 'art of war' or fanciful, flowery language that could disguise the truth; her nature was destruction. Nothing more, nothing less. She was not as ashamed of it as she had once been, but there was little value in denying that truth.

But what did all of that mean to Remus's question? Well, she couldn't exactly explain all of that, and she didn't really want to get into whether or not she enjoyed it, because frankly she wasn't sure if she still had her old revulsion for the concept, and the fact that that didn't really bother her anymore was itself more cause for concern than anything else.

Lot of thinking for a cop out answer. But she didn't want to lie to Remus, exactly, and so she would have to take refuge in half-truths, and hope that if there was a god, he wouldn't strike her down with divine vengeance for lying to a priest.

"...By necessity," Nayru allowed neutrally, realizing how empty her words tasted immediately. "And by choice," she admitted shortly afterwards with a hint more hesitation. Certainly, it was the barest blink of an eye in her lifetime that she had turned her eye to actually learning to fight properly - even by human standards she was little more than a fledgling in the way of the warrior, only having started... was it a few months ago? Time all seemed to be blurring together lately, almost as if it were all one continuous dream rather than a discrete set of contiguous events. She could remember each of her encounters with Veigue, with Elly, and the events that had accompanied them - but it was more difficult to attach timeframes to them like she could with her meeting with Vandalf.

Maybe she was just going senile in her old age. Half smiling at the thought, Nayru continued, masking her reaction with a slightly different train of outward thought that was admittedly partially designed to deceive - though less in its own right than simply to draw her smile to it instead rather than hinting at her thoughts. "It's something that comes naturally to me. I don't have a great deal of formal training," and by that she meant little to none outside of some martial arts classes that had just been a hobby at the time, "but the Elibe of today is a dangerous place for those who cannot defend themselves. By necessity and by choice alike, I find myself drawn into the... stories of others, playing as many roles as can be found; the knight in shining armor, the damsel in distress, the black knight, the planter of orchards."

Of dumbass trees was left implied but unsaid; the last thing she OR Remus needed was Amelia latching back on to that train of events. She smiled guilelessly at Remus and continued her simplistic explanation. "If you seek a soldier, you would be best served looking elsewhere. I have but my instincts and my experience to guide me."

[Remus]

Remus wasn't one to usually pick apart statements, but one in particular of Nayru's had given him pause for thought. That she played many roles. Albeit her mentioning of planting orchards was not lost unto him, and gave him cause to chuckle warmly; he looked at the road ahead quietly for a few moments while trying to contemplate Nayru as a damsel in distress. He couldn't really find it accurate if ever he had to identify her with something. To Remus, she oozed with an odd charisma and power. He had an almost impossible time imagining her as someone in a genuine situation of distress. He let the quiet rhythm of their footsteps crunching on the cold ilian dirt road occupy the silence while he tried to word his next statement in a way that wouldn't offend..though in his mind he doubted he could actually offend Nayru. "Haha..Damsel in distress? I..confess myself unable to imagine you in this role. I fear I've fulfilled that in our two encounters alone more than even my thoughts could speculate you fulfilling it. Aha..though I fear for Elibe when you are the damsel in distress Nayru. "

After his chuckle subsided and his tone grew a bit more appropriate to the topic they conversed on, Remus looked ahead before speaking thoughtfully "Though I know we discussed already about it, I confess that is however why I wished to have some means to defend Amelia and Owain. I can't protect them from harm on my own. I am forced to rely on others, and it often worries me that some day it won't be enough and will cost me. I won't always have people like you around to protect them or myself when things get bad. Would it be that I could exchange my stave for magic? I might have very well taken it. However I do recall you pointing out so in our conversation prior, healing has uses in it's own right and should not be overlooked. So that leaves me striving to attain magic to protect these two while maintaining my healing. It is not..uncommon, but it takes time. I do believe that is the frustrating part. The time it takes. Our lives are finite, and time is not always on our side sadly. I feel a frustrated duality of patience at times and impatience at other times while. Tis a troubling plight personally."

[Nayru Al-Saiduq]

Nayru chuckled at Remus's jests about her being a maiden in distress, but there was a darkness in her tone, a solemn familiarity she wished she didn't understand, and very little humor to accompany it. She certainly hadn't intended to mislead Remus, and in retrospect she could understand the disconnect, but a disconnect it was nonetheless. She didn't particularly care to explain, but blind stupidity - or was it some nobleminded pursuit of clarity? Were the two not the same? - forced her to do so regardless. "If only every foe was one that could be confronted. Strength is rarely the solution when it, itself, is the problem."

Flowery bullshit language aside, it had been a metaphor that she... hadn't really thought through very well, apparently. But it was true. When your own strength - your birthright, the terrible power that had haunted you since birth - was nothing more than the power of unadultered destruction, when your mind was too weak to control it, one's own mind could become a prison from which there was no escape... and herself, for all her so-called power and strength and bravery, nothing more than a helpless girl trapped inside that accursed shell.

And Remus would never know how true his fear had come, for Elibe had suffered greatly from her weakness. Hundreds... thousands of victims over the course of centuries, isolated villages and bandit camps alike obliterated without any regard for innocence. Oh, she could work to atone for all of that, but those people would never come back.

But Veigue had rescued her from that. Nayru was thoroughly aware she still had much to learn about actually controlling her power safely, but the fact that she could simply live now, be herself even if it involved a certain level of caution, was truly like having been saved by a shining hero. Though she couldn't really imagine Veigue wearing a princely cape. For some reason it just sounded silly. Still, she didn't really want to get heavily into the subject, so Nayru left it there for the time being. If Remus wanted to push harder she wouldn't necessarily blame him, the fault was her own, but she didn't intend to go much further on the subject unless he pushed. Better to focus on his issues, anyways.

And perhaps ironically, they were nearly the polar opposite of hers; the search for power, to protect - and to destroy, even if he didn't think of it like that. For that was perhaps the one truth of Elibe, more than anything else; even used responsibily, safely, it was the power to destroy. It could be used to save people, but it would never be the power to save people. Not even the holiest of light magics, golden glory that resembled pillars of light from heaven itself, had any inherent purpose other than destruction.

Much as that was one of the truths of Elibe, though, so too was there another; that that very power was needed to survive in the world they lived in. Power might be ugly, it could be abused, and it was certainly nothing that well-meaning would-be saviors liked to think about much, but Elibe was simply too cruel and too chaotic a continent to be solved with merely words. It was the one benefit to her own power, and how she was attempting to live from now on. ...And while she didn't necessarily blame him for wanting the power to do something more than play the damsel in distress... Nayru wasn't entirely sure that Remus understood all of that. She certainly didn't think he was going to go mad with power and start butchering people by the billion, so why did it bother her? She wasn't really sure. Maybe it was just something important to her - the hypocritical irony of someone who existed with power as their boon companion.

Maybe she just didn't want Remus to ever go down a road similar to the one she had traveled.

"There is a saying I heard somewhere many years ago," Nayru responded quietly to Remus's speech. She couldn't actually remember WHERE she'd heard it - it was doubtless there in her memory if she searched, things usually were, but when one had five hundred years of memories to sift through, a single irrelevant bit of information was often more trouble than it was worth. She continued neutrally, repeating the words she had heard so long ago. "'The progression of healers to mages is not so much a progression of power or skill, but willingness to harm.'"

Her quote spent, Nayru smiled ruefully, shaking her head a little as her thoughts went in a predictable direction. "There is a certain level of hypocrisy in me, of all people, lecturing anyone else on Elibe about the dangers of searching for power. But I'm not trying to convince you to shy away from it. Our world is an ugly place, one where ugly things like the power to destroy can be useful... or even necessary. Words only work if both parties are willing, and few bandits or mad kings alike are truly willing to listen. Sometimes power is the only way to protect others. But..."

She looked to Remus seriously, spearing him with her gaze. She was being was perhaps uncommonly serious by the standards of how Remus had known her, but this wasn't the time for her to be messing around. "Just don't forget that. Power is inherently the ability to destroy, and it comes with temptations, consequences... the more power you have, the more others will fear you, attempt to use you, or destroy you - not because you want to be a threat, but because your very existence IS a threat to them. Your superiors in the church may see no threat in you now - but what of when you come back wielding the light of the heavens as if it was your own? What of bandits, assassins, who no longer see you as a harmless bystander, but a very real threat to be dealt with? Power... true power warps everything around it in ways that you may not understand until it is too late. It defines and redefines dynamics, changes things you never wanted to change... and it can change you before you even realize it."

[Remus]

"If only every foe was one that could be confronted. Strength is rarely the solution when it, itself, is the problem," This gave the priest a momentary pause in other thought processes as he pondered her words. Though he was sure he didn't grasp the actuality of it, it seemed as if she was implying that her own strength caused her issues. In his head he imagined a vicious circle. Strength causing a problem, but acquiring more strength through solving other problems and thus returning to point one. Remus had to shelve that notion. It was a thought he really couldn't wrap his head around. Perhaps when he had power himself? That was a weird notion though. He had a hard time imagining himself with actual power. He was shaken from these thoughts though as Nayru brought up another point with a smile that seemed far too bittersweet. "The progression of healers to mages is not so much a progression of power or skill, but willingness to harm."

That..made a bit more sense. Remus lifted his hand momentarily from Amelia's small grasp as he rubbed the back of his head. He smiled a bit sheepishly before speaking. In this regard, he could speak his thoughts and what he felt in his heart. "I don't think I'll ever want to harm people. I just want the means to keep those I care about safe from harm. I know it's not so simple as that, and to prevent harm to some your often harming others but..I just find myself hard pressed trying to see me harming anyone else. At-least willingly. "

Nayru had taken this conversation to a serious tone. Such severity even, that Remus wondered of how much she spoke from experience. He knew fairly little about her after all. The Priest shifted his staff a bit, adjusting it before re-gripping the children's hands as they walked. He gazed out towards the road they walked down while trying to best formulate his response. At no point did he want to dismiss Nayru's thoughts, or concerns. Nor did he want to seem to quick to disregard their relevance to him personally. He just couldn't see it though. He couldn't see himself willingly harming others. He couldn't see himself going mad with power, and honestly he couldn't see himself getting that powerful even if he learned light magic. Even if he did, he knew it would pale in comparison to powerful mages like his sister, who had a natural adept skill for the nature.

Remus smiled warmly to Nayru once more before he spoke up. "To be honest Nayru...I can't see myself getting that powerful. If it is true as you say, that it is a willingness to harm which alters a magic user's power..well I fear that mentality of mine may inhibit the phenomenal cosmic powers I could potentially obtain. I've never wished harm onto people. Not for a moment. I don't think I have that potential within myself either. All of my life, I've spent my time trying to help everyone I come across. It would contradict my very nature to redirect that aspiring care into anything close to violent mentalities. While that is not to belittle its usefulness, for as you said sadly sometimes violence is necessary...we have soldiers and people like you who are willing to help others with their strength. I confess I do not know of your burdens in life, nor I feel will I ever know them all; but even as you struggle with these your efforts alleviate the burden of others. Willingness to harm may be present..but that makes you no less of a good person in my opinion. Yet despite this I find myself still concluding that I am likely to remain er..as my sister so aptly puts it..a sheep within a world of wolves. "

How true it was. Alas, he could only hope to keep doing what he could. Perhaps enough little things, enough little deeds and changes, could make a bigger difference.

[Nayru Al-Saiduq]

"Well, you don't exactly strike me as the type to go mad with power," Nayru responded in a jesting tone, her lips quirked into a small smile that belied her honesty. And it was true really, not just some lipservice; she would never expect Remus to struggle with her own issues, or turn into the next Kraft, willing to butcher all in his way of a brighter tomorrow. So it wasn't really that she was trying to stave off Elibe's next evil overlord... which would be Amelia anyways, regardless of what she or Remus did, so might as well get used to it now.

"I suppose..." She supposed what? The all-knowing and incredibly wise dragon unable to even form a coherent thought - truly Elibe should fear such mighty creatures. "Maybe I just wanted to spare you the world you would be entering." It sounded almost petty, certainly stupid, and it WAS. She couldn't make that decision for him and it was hubris incarnate to even try. "When you're stronger than the people around you, dynamics change. People fear you. Even if you have never once given them cause to fear you, even if your only display of strength was to help them... realizing that you exist in a different world from them colors their perceptions."

Not that Nayru was generally particularly subtle, but even by her standards, the slightly sad note in her voice suggested that she was speaking entirely too much from experience from her tastes. "You think it's just the power to help people - but it is an ascension from a world of sheep to the realm of wolves, a journey from which there is no return, no looking back. With power comes responsibility, choices... and the more of it you have, the more the repercussions of a single bad choice can echo throughout your life."

She shook her head, a little annoyed that she had waxed so whinily eloquent about something she hadn't intended to say much about. It had just all come spilling out before she realized it. "I can't say as that I envy people with real power. Being able to punch people hard is absolutely inconsequential compared to the horrifying responsibility that kings and emperors bear. I cannot even begin to imagine how much worse than my perceived woes their burdens are. Something to consider if you plan on running for vice-dictator of Elibe under Amelia."