Elly
Pegasus Knight
Rookie Squirrel!
Posts: 101
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Post by Elly on Dec 9, 2011 23:26:57 GMT -6
"Again, again!" Elly's cheerful cries mingled with those of the crowd as she raised her hand in the air, waving, cupping the other next to her mouth in a futile attempt to overcome the booming voices that echoed inside the small inn. The bard bowed gracefully, a large smile plastered on his face. A man, his face rugged, climbed clumsily on top of his table, an iron tankard in his hand; he swayed dangerously in place, turning to face the musician before mimicking the performer, falling backwards as he attempted to straighten up again. The inn roared with laughter, and Elly joined in, clapping her hands gleefully. Oh, where could Nayru be? She was missing all the fun! She stretched her neck contentedly. It felt so great to finally have a good dinner, and take off her armor, it was pretty uncomfortable to wear it all day long, especially with how busy today had been.
Come to think of it, the young knight hadn't seen her mysterious companion all evening. She hadn't been at their table during dinner, had she? Her right hand played distractedly with strands of pink hair that had come loose from her ponytail throughout the day. The girl stared upwards, lost in thought. It wasn't good for her to skip meals. Her eyes widened in realization at that last thought. The flight, of course! She hadn't been able to eat regularly for days the first few times she rode on Heather, either. But, it still wasn't okay to avoid eating, that'd only make her sick? She shook her head, strengthening her resolve. No, Nayru had to eat something light, at least, she'd make sure of it. She stood up earnestly, heading for the kitchen. A few minutes later, she exited again with a smile on her face, and a loaf of bread in her hands. That ought to help!
She walked past the crowd discreetly, heading towards their room hurriedly. To her surprise, however, it was empty. She tilted her head, puzzled, her shoulders slumping. She wasn't here, either? But...where could she be? Worried, she walked outside hastily, the chilly night breeze causing her to shiver. Was she okay? Maybe bandits had kidnapped her! Her voice had a slight edge of urgency to it as she circled the inn, calling out her name as loudly as she could. "Nayru! Where are you?"
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Post by Nayru Al-Saiduq on Dec 10, 2011 0:02:47 GMT -6
She lay in the moonlight, eyes furrowed shut - the roof of the inn wasn't exactly the top of the world, but it was as close as she was realistically going to get for the time being, and Nayru was in dire need of a bit of familiarity. If she closed her eyes and let the gentle breeze kiss her skin, felt the endless sky above her as far as the eye could see, it almost felt as though she was floating in the sea of stars so far overhead.
It was where she should be - not amongst creatures so fundamentally different than herself. Nayru held no hatred for humanity, nor did she regret her decision to leave Arcadia behind, but every so often she was forced to face just how really alone she as in the world. No friends, no family, no loved ones - simple things that even most humans, "inferior" though they might be to some dragons, took for granted as simple facts of life.
It wasn't really like her to dwell on the negatives in life, Nayru knew that, but the events of earlier had left her with much to think about and the less positive implications were harder to ignore than usual. She had survived the centuries through pragmatism and placing self-preservation above all else, not useless melancholy and dolor. It was so easy to let herself wallow in useless self-pity sometimes, though; the catastrophic process of self-flagellation that Elly seemed to assume was a normal part of landing still weighed heavily.
Speak of the devil - the incompetent pegasus knight's wavery voice rose through the air, thin and uncertain. Nayru was sorely tempted to ignore the girl, but caught the vindictive attitude before it developed further. She couldn't entirely blame Elly for the entire debacles; much of it was entirely her own fault for even agreeing to travel with the girl, and the little flying squirrel certainly hadn't intended for any of the complications to occur.
The manakete let out an imperceptible sigh, drawing it out as she felt her shoulders untense once more, then lifted her head slightly so she could speak in the general direction of where she thought the girl was. "I am up here." Nayru was willing to leave it at that, but had a sudden horrible vision of Elly breaking out the accursed flying horse to reach the top of the building and somehow contriving to collapse the entire structure in the process. "...You can climb up from the fence in the back alley." If you must was left unsaid, though she doubted Elly would have the slightest idea of her feelings on the matter.
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Elly
Pegasus Knight
Rookie Squirrel!
Posts: 101
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Post by Elly on Dec 10, 2011 0:24:46 GMT -6
Elly's head snapped towards the source of the voice, relief flooding her. Thank goodness she was okay! Still, what in Elibe was she doing up there? She bit her lip, her brow furrowing in concentration. Maybe she should go to the stables and get Heather, it looked pretty hard to climb up there? Besides, Heather would cheer Nayru up! Oh, but, the poor filly was probably asleep by now. It had been a pretty rough day for her, too.
She walked over to the fence, studying it. It was a bit tall for her, but maybe she could take hold of it with both hands while jumping? She stared at the loaf of bread in her left hand. Oh, she shouldn't have left her pouch inside...but, Nayru's tone had sounded a bit odd earlier. Maybe she wanted company? Yes, that must be it. Nodding her head, she steeled her resolve.
Taking hold of the bread with her mouth, careful not to bite it, she jumped, stretching her arms as far up as she could. She frowned in frustration, a muffled noise escaping her as her fingers barely reached the top. Curses! Her eyes cast around, looking for something she could use, before falling on the horizontal planks that served as reinforcements. Duh, of course! Using them as footholds, she pulled herself towards the top, wobbling perilously in place before stepping over to the inn's roof, carefully stepping towards the woman.
She reached up to take the loaf in her right hand, stopping next to Nayru. The breeze seemed to pick up again, and she carefully tucked her hair behind her ears to keep it out of her face. "Hello! I saw you weren't at dinner, so I brought you some food?" She offered the bread to her, smiling. "I couldn't stand eating anything at all after my first few flights, either, so I thought you might want something light, y'know?" She sat down next to her acquaintance, pulling her legs up to her body and wrapping her arms around them to keep warm. Her eyes wandered over to the other rooftops; the town was quiet, yet some people still wandered the streets. It was funny to watch them from above, yet not so far up that she couldn't recognize their features.
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Post by Nayru Al-Saiduq on Dec 10, 2011 1:29:13 GMT -6
"That was not my first flight!"
The words came out in a venomous hiss, expunged with tangible force as Nayru's irritation instantly spiked before she could regain control. She regretted it as soon as the words left her mouth; she knew that Elly was just trying to help, and she appreciated the thought, but the girl had unwittingly said very nearly exactly the wrong thing. For the manakete, already on the verge of crumbling under the weight of her own self-loathing, being reminded directly of what she had been trying to forget was incredibly grating.
She forced herself to lay still, refusing to open her eyes or further react; Nayru had had enough of making a fool of herself for the day, and in her emotional state, she wasn't sure that she could avoid doing something else stupid if she didn't take great care to retain control.
"No, I - apologize." The words came out haltingly, propelled by the knowledge that what she had said was wrong, but held back by her pride. Wounded as it was, it continued to make things difficult. She had no interest in detailing her entire life story to the girl, nor actually explaining the issue in anything resembling its entirety, but she owed Elly at least a minimal explanation for her actions. "I have flown before." Many times. "Of the countless things in this world that I have experienced, there is nothing more sublime than to feel the wind at your side, the sky ahead of you, the world little more than an irrelevant speck in the distance."
The words came out jumbled and hesitant as Nayru attempted to express the concepts in coherent speech. It sounded idiotic even to her, and yet she could think of no better way to say it. "I do not know that I could explain my - reaction earlier, or more accurately, that you would understand entirely. It was a moment of self-doubt, of realizing that... something I had taken for granted, something integral to my existence, was not quite as constant as I had thought."
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Elly
Pegasus Knight
Rookie Squirrel!
Posts: 101
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Post by Elly on Dec 11, 2011 20:39:33 GMT -6
Elly recoiled at the sharp tone in Nayru's voice, her neck turning towards the woman sharply enough to make her wince. For an instant, she felt an urge to run away, a slight tinge of fear sneaking into her mind; her heart pounded furiously in her chest, yet she quashed the reaction swiftly. She listened to Nayru's words attentively, enraptured, struggling to follow her companion's complex vocabulary at times. Seriously, what was it with people using all those complicated words?
She closed her eyes, mentally going over Nayru's words, concentration etched on her features, for once thinking before babbling out in response. Nayru sounded upset, and maybe she could help, no? She grimaced as she went over the older woman's outburst. Was she offended that she'd thought her acquaintance was new to flying, or something like that? Naw, that couldn't be it, she told herself, mentally shrugging, before catching herself. Well, she'd seen one of the knights getting really angry at a fellow recruit once for confusing her with one of the squires. She bit her lip thoughtfully. Maybe it was a bit similar? No matter what it was, though, it was pretty clear Nayru had flown before, right? She shook her head furiously. Urk, this thinking before speaking was far too complicated!
She suddenly realized with a start that it had been a while since Nayru stopped talking. Oh, crud, now she was going to think she was offended or something! Elly's thoughts homed in on the older woman's description of flying, and a smile came unbidden to her as she relaxed. "Yeah, it's really great, isn't it?" She sighed, the thought of flying wrapping around her like a comforting blanket. "It's such a rush. There just ain't nothing like being in the sky with Heather, and feeling free, y'know? Flying is really important to me, too, and, uh..." She paused, hesitating for a few moments. "Did you use to fly a lot before?"
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Post by Nayru Al-Saiduq on Dec 15, 2011 22:08:58 GMT -6
"Mmmh."
It was a noncomittal agreement, Nayru's way of showing that she was paying attention to Elly's words while another discussion entirely was going on inside her mind. She was feeling acutely guilty for snapping at Elly, poor wording and bad timing aside, and she had never actually come close to working out her issues from before Elly's arrival. The manakete was still intensely aware of the maelstrom of emotion sweeping through her, threatening to creep into her voice the instant she lost control again.
As even-tempted and pleasant as Nayru tended to be, it was not due to a total inability to feel negative emotion or a magical ability to forgive everyone. No, she just internalized it, locked it away in neat little compartments to deal with later, and then never actually came to terms with the issue. Worked well enough most of the time, but keeping the whole mess from boiling over required a very even personality and staid demeanor. Decades of practice had done wonders for learning to hold the charade against all scrutiny, but the events of the day had worn heavily on her, and the human girl had come at the worst possible time, when she had allowed herself to slip a little bit. It was proving to be more difficult than she had anticipated to shore up the metaphorical dam.
She hadn't carried on for centuries without dissolving into an emotional mess by sheer luck, though. There was a hint of steel in her bearing that belied the absurd self-control she held close; even as emotionally weakened as she was, she was determined not to actually show it to a damned human. Nayru exhaled deeply, the sharp bite of the cold air in her lungs helping to focus her mind, and pondered a reply. She certainly couldn't tell Elly the truth, but perhaps she could vent slightly while - purely unintentionally, of course - misleading the girl slightly. Humans had a tendency to fill in the blanks with their own explanations quite readily with whatever seemed likely; if she stayed vague enough, it was likely that Elly could prove of some use!
"I can't say that I've actually flown a pegasus before today," which was entirely true if one took the statement very literally, "but I can certainly empathize with a love of flight. We have that much in common, I suppose." They also shared a sex, and they were both alive. Beyond that: not a lot of similarities. Human versus nigh-immortal superhuman being, common sense versus none - Nayru blithely ignored her own often-poor decision-making skills - five hundred years old versus somewhere in the vicinity of fifteen. "Yes, I have flown many times before. It was a great part of my life for-" a couple centuries "-some time, but people change, as does the world." Several hundred years was plenty of time for the world to change, and that accursed malarkey with the Eight Heroes had likely re-inflamed anti-dragon sentiments left dormant since the Scouring. Nayru did not intend to find out firsthand.
"I do miss it, though. Sometimes I wonder if I made the right choice. That decision gave me the opportunity to travel, to meet people, to help them, and I cannot regret that - but the siren song of the sky still calls to me, an ethereal melody that I cannot resist forever." Forever was a long time, but Elly thought in mortal years. Perhaps the idealistic girl would imagine her a wyvern rider laid low by Bern's demilitarization, or even a pegasus knight who had eloped in search of love. Nayru allowed herself a small chuckle at that last bit - she suspected that she was coming up with more outlandish scenarios than the girl she was spinning them for. "Someday I will return to the sky and leave this world behind, hopefully a better place than I found it." To Arcadia, or perhaps even to the world that the dragons had been banished to, long ago, if she ever found the key.
Nayru paused, not sure how to actually ask the obvious question. She wasn't particularly good at small talk or entirely flawless when it came to human customs; if there was anything she had learned over the years, it was that societies everywhere had different customs, many of them vastly different from each other, and what was a harmless question in one could be taken as a mortal insult in another. Then again, this seemed to be a day for making colossally stupid decisions and intentionally acting as far out of her normal character as possible; why not keep it up? "What... event caused your love of flying, if I may ask? Your affection for your..." don't call it a flying entree don't call it a flying entree "creature is palpable."
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Elly
Pegasus Knight
Rookie Squirrel!
Posts: 101
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Post by Elly on Dec 27, 2011 0:51:29 GMT -6
"Huh?" Elly tilted her head to the side, puzzled by the sudden question, yet her mind focused on the older woman's previous words. "So, um, y' haven't flown on a pegasus before today? But, then, that means, if you've flown that much before..." Her brow furrowed in concentration, before her eyes widened in surprise; she fought the urge to recoil, but couldn't hide the look of disappointment that spread across her features. Elly rested her chin on her knees, confused, her tone subdued. "You were a wyvern rider, right?" Wyvern riders were suppossed to be evil brutes, no? Barbarians, uncivilized and treacherous, that's what everyone back at the barracks said...
But, that just wasn't Nayru, was it? No, she was as graceful as the captain. She couldn't explain it, but she definitely felt like the older knights back at home. Proud, and strong, definitely strong...confident, too? She shook her head. "I'm sorry," she blurted out, before realizing she had spoken out loud; she felt her ears grow warm, and continued hurriedly, her voice barely above a squeak. "I, uh, I sort of thought all wyvern riders were savages and thiefs, y'know?" She bit her tongue, waving her hands frantically as she realized how that sounded. "What I mean is, y' totally aren't like that, so I just felt confused, and..." She trailed off, wincing, closing her mouth fast enough for her teeth to clack together audibly. Oh, now she'd done it.
"Ugh. I'm sorry, Nayru, I..." She paused, trying to organize her thoughts for once. "Ever since I remember, I've always admired the pegasus knights? Papa used to tell me stories, y'know, about how they fought to protect the families of Ilia, and helped people in need, and hunted dragons?" Her posture relaxed as her grip on her knees loosened slightly. "And, the knights are so honorable, and graceful, and brave, so it's always been my dream to become one of them, too!" She turned to face Nayru, smiling. "You really reminded me of the knights back home, y'know? So, uh, it's not what I expected from a former wyvern rider?"
Her thoughts flashed back to the question Nayru had asked before. "Oh, uh, my first time flying was after being recruited?" She winced slightly as unpleasant memories surfaced, of scrubbing the headquarters' stables and office floors clean every day. "Well, after about a year of, uh... training?" She wrinkled her nose before continuing. "But, it was pretty amazing when we were introduced to our partners, and I love Heather, even if she can be pretty stubborn at times? But, flying with her is just magical, y'know?" She felt giddy just thinking about it, how liberating it felt to take off into the sky with the filly. Her excitement was short-lived, however, as she recalled her superior's orders.
"Though, well, I'm not suppossed to be flying without supervision?" She snorted disdainfully. "And, the commander is pretty mean, too, she said she wouldn't approve any more flight time for me until I learned how to..." Oh, crud! That had been close! She felt her throat tighten with nervousness; she didn't exactly want to let Nayru know that she was illiterate. She'd probably let her down with her flying skills already, and wasn't looking forward to looking dumb in front of her now, as well. But, really, reading was just boring, why was she suppossed to learn how to anyways? "Uh, until I have more training?" She finished dubiously, nervous, hoping Nayru hadn't noticed the slip.
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Post by Nayru Al-Saiduq on Dec 27, 2011 3:19:35 GMT -6
Nayru chuckled, unable to keep it in. There was something about this girl that made the manakete want to throttle and hug her at the same time, or perhaps combine the two into a... thruggle? The oddities that popped out of her mind worried her sometimes. She supposed that she could be insulted at how the girl had shrunk from her at the merest concept of her "secret nature" as a wyvern rider, but prejudice was widespread and nigh-impossible to dislodge without significant effort; the "us versus them" mentality ran deep, back to - well, the unprecedented human cooperation that had made the Souring possible. That did much to immediately quell any degree of merriment that had filled her mind a moment before. Elly's little comment about hunting dragons didn't help.
It wouldn't actually take that much effort to snap the mortal's neck, and no one would come looking for a missing trainee.
Nayru let out a long, deep breath, tiny reverbrations in her chest giving it the sound a ragged edge. She regretted the thought already, but it bothered her that humans, in their eternal need to always be in the right, had twisted the tragedy of the Scouring into a noble crusade on the dastardly beasts that had threatened them with slavery and death. It wasn't the first time that she had heard such callous, wanton disregard for the truth of the Scouring, but to hear it from such an innocent drew it far closer to home.
The "Heroes" of the Scouring had seen to it that their children and their children's children were indoctrinated to the point that few humans alive today even knew that another story existed. Most believed that dragons were on the same level as horses or wyverns - dumb beasts, monsters who cared only for food and shelter, not creatures every bit as intelligent and worthy of existing as mankind. She turned to the little pegasus rider abruptly, forcing herself into action, busying her mind forming words in order to interrupt her train of thought. The anger had subsided, but if she kept on that line of thought, she could not be sure for how much longer. Her eyes opened abruptly, cerulean staring into and through her companion. "Elly. This world is never simple. There are noble wyvern riders even as there are mindless brutes - and there are bloodthirsty beasts amongst pegasus knights, even as there are the graceful riders you admire. There is beauty amongst filth, filth amongst jewels. Grouping entire social strata, entire species into the same stereotype is woefully inadequate at best, and an insult to many."
Nayru turned away again, as abruptly as she had stopped speaking. She didn't care to lecture the girl, but there was simply no way that she could leave Elly with such a narrow view of the world, knowing that she had been given a chance to change it, or at least make an attempt to start the girl down that path. People - dragon or humans, the species did not matter in the least - only changed when they wanted to, and only if they truly wanted to change.
One could no more force change in anyone than they could change the world by wishing very hard, but she was not about to back down without giving it an attempt. "Illian pegasus knights do not fly around and look pretty - they are mercenaries. They kill for a living, for the highest bidder, no matter whether it is right or wrong. Commanders always have the ability to turn down an assignment, but your country's brigades are known for how efficient they are at killing things, how loyal they are to their employer, not for being the champions of justice across Elibe."
It was somewhat uncalled for to put the truth to Elly so harshly, but the manakete suspected that some of Aerious's bluntness had rubbed off on her earlier. It was a nicer explanation than admitting she was still a little put off by the comment about hunting down dragons, anyways, and it seemed the most direct way to at least make Elly consider her point, even if she had phrased it a little more harshly than hoped.
She couldn't really think of anything to add after the little speech. Replying to Elly's comments about flying seemed exceptionally awkward after such a display, and she suspected that the girl would have plenty to say in defense of her beloved idols. Nayru just hoped that Elly might at least notice that she hadn't defended wyvern riders, that the girl wouldn't dismiss her words as the ravings of a slighted dirty wyvern rider. She closed her eyes again, pondering what her companion had said, realizing with a moment of horror that she had never actually replied to that, either. "But... thank you. For what it is worth." For what, exactly, she wasn't sure - but it just seemed appropriate. It was hard to dislike the girl, as uneducated, as rustic, as dubiously competent as the little hellion was.
Maybe she was just touched that Elly had managed to put aside her preconceived notions long enough to admit that one wyvern rider out of the bunch wasn't a complete monster. In retrospect, perhaps she should have spent more time on that. There was bound to be some awkward silence for her to consider the ramifications of going off like that!
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Elly
Pegasus Knight
Rookie Squirrel!
Posts: 101
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Post by Elly on Dec 27, 2011 21:55:14 GMT -6
Elly's eyes widened at Nayru's words; though complex as always, their meaning was clear. The young girl inhaled sharply, her shoulders tensing in agitation, her tone rising. "No! No, we ain't like that!" She shook her head in denial, her heartbeat rapidly accelerating. No, pegasus knights were always on the side of good, always, no matter what! She closed her eyes tightly. "The commander..." she trailed off, the tide of emotions that had threatened to overwhelm her running its course, leaving her feeling ashamed and confused. The knot in her throat seemed to tighten. The commander was just like she wanted to be, beautiful and elegant, confident, someone everyone trusted, but most of all...she knew the commander would never abandon someone in need? She wasn't just a mercenary, she couldn't be...
"I..." Her voice quavered as she struggled to keep tears from her eyes. "Maybe you're right about wyverns, y'know?" She exhaled, her breath coming out ragged, wavering on the verge of a sob. "Th'...the..." she struggled with the word, a corner of her mind still rebelling against the idea of a wyvern rider being on the same standing as Ilia's finest. "Knight... with us earlier, and you, you're both...not like I thought wyvern riders were?" Her shoulders slumped; she felt as though she had run through one of the commander's training drills after skipping breakfast. She blinked rapidly, looking away, bringing a hand up to quickly brush away a few tears that blurred her vision. "But...Papa's stories..." Elly trailed off, unsure as to how to finish the sentence, her voice coming out slightly hoarse. How many other things about them were wrong, too? The small girl shivered, the night breeze seemingly a lot chillier all of a sudden, and she hugged her knees tightly.
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Post by Nayru Al-Saiduq on Dec 27, 2011 23:10:54 GMT -6
Nayru/Elly convo theme: youtu.be/poiqPQpiTN0Well, that had gone - not as planned. Nayru had sort of assumed that the girl would instantly rise to the defense of pegasus knights, shutting her out. All she had really expected out of the conversation was an opportunity to possibly plant the seeds of change in Elly's mind, make her wonder if perhaps there was some value to a more nuanced approach. She certainly hadn't realized that she had already made such an impression on the girl, and it rankled a bit that she hadn't noticed. It also spoke to the girl being more impressionable than was strictly healthy, but that was, for better or for worse, a quality that would be beaten out of her by life in relatively short order if she kept traveling. The manakete could see Elly huddled up into herself out of the corner of her cracked eyelids, and had the decency to feel a bit ashamed of herself for laying it on so hard. So much for being the mysterious wise woman - just another reminder of how easy it was to completely misjudge an emotional situation even after nearly five centuries of life. Part of her wanted to hug the girl, but there was a fear remembered all too well from Aerious' story earlier - an innocent girl, destroyed by the simple act of positive interference by a well-meaning dragon. Alina's fate had hit her harder than she realized at the time. Nayru settled for sitting up, awkwardly extending one arm to rest tentatively on Elly's closest shoulder. It wasn't much of a moment, and she felt absolutely ridiculous sitting like that, but it was about the best she could do to show any degree of support to her companion. So many years of keeping herself reigned in around humans could not be broken that easily, and even if they could, all that would be revealed was a confused, conflicted young woman. The wise woman act only worked because of how predictable and simple most humans were, not because she was actually wise. "I am sorry, Elly." Apologizing. Again. She seemed to be doing a lot of that today. The irony that this was also the first day that she had talked much in some time was not lost on her, nor was the link between her attempts to positively influence people and the rising consistency of the need to apologize for doing so poorly. The shame was deliciously ironic. "I did not mean to belittle your commander; I am sure she is an excellent woman." It actually wasn't flattery - Nayru was rapidly coming to believe that anyone who could actually deal with Elly would have to possess superhuman levels of patience and perception. Perhaps some day she would meet this commander for herself. "All I intended, Elly, was to bring you to think for yourself when you hear these stories. There is often a kernel of truth to legends, but never forget that it is always the victors who survive to tell the story." Oh, if only the girl knew how true that was, how horribly that simple fact had crippled an entire race and doomed them to more than a millennium of darkness. She found that she could not even look at her companion, turning her head until the darkness left her eyes. "Nearly by definition, legends are biased in favor of those who won. Not out of dark purposes," Though how else could the atrocities of the Scouring be justified? "But because they truly believed that they were doing the right thing, and their minds provide excuses to help them ignore the other side of the story."If only she could believe that the "heroes" of the Scouring had just been misguided men and women, well-meaning champions, not vicious monsters. "History is rarely as simple as legends would portray it to be. That is why archaeologists exist, why scholars argue endlessly about the truths behind the formation of a given legend. It is the pursuit of knowledge that drives the truth to be revealed."
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Elly
Pegasus Knight
Rookie Squirrel!
Posts: 101
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Post by Elly on Dec 28, 2011 23:39:47 GMT -6
Elly closed her eyes tightly. Something about Nayru's words made her feel as though she were back at the barracks, being lectured by the commander yet again; the gentle reprisal so familiar, and yet so alien when it came from a different voice. And yet, despite the dozens of talks she had heard about thinking for herself, usually right alongside the other recruits, this was the first time that the words really seemed to have a weight, a meaning behind them, a connection to the real world. Her stories, no longer an absolute truth, felt now like flimsy, fancy tales. How much more in them was a lie, too?
Her head pounded sluggishly, the emotional torrent taking its toll and leaving behind a dull, throbbing headache in its wake. A sob escaped her, followed by another, causing her whole body to shudder, and she realized with a start her cheeks were quite wet with tears. How long had she been crying? She sniffled, trying to regain enough control to speak, yet could only manage a series of hiccups when she opened her mouth. Which, for some reason, struck her as particularly funny; she giggled softly, her quiet laughter mixing with occasional sobs in an odd dissonance.
Elly reached up to pull her hair away from her face, only now becoming aware of Nayru's hand on her shoulder. She smiled, scooting over closer to give her a brief hug; it was only a few moments later that she realized in surprise the older woman wasn't her commander. She pulled her arms back awkwardly, hoping the former rider hadn't taken offense to her actions, her gaze firmly lodged on the roof of the inn. She licked her lips nervously, biting down on them softly, looking for something to break the silence with.
"What was it like the first time you flew, Nayru?" She paused, startled at the question, unsure of why she'd asked it, yet now feeling genuinely curious about it. "And, uh...I'm sorry, too, y'know?" She found herself unable to meet the other woman's eyes, guilt and shame at the way she had acted earlier in the day heavy in her heart. "I...shouldn't have assumed all that about wyvern riders, like, all the stories about them being, uh..." She trailed off, the words that had once come easily as a description of the Bernese knights now sounding childish and prejudiced. She didn't know about the rest of the stories, but that, at least, was something she could accept for now.
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Post by Nayru Al-Saiduq on Dec 29, 2011 1:27:56 GMT -6
It was amazing how warm the human was. No, not the human, Elly. She had a name. After her talk with Aerious earlier, how often she had referred to them as humans, it was so easy to think of individual members of the race as just parts of a whole. Elly the trainee pegasus knight. The bitter taste of shame, of her momentary hypocrisy, stung Nayru, reminded her of how far she was from actually achieving her dream, of how weak she really was right now. Dragon or not, there was so much more left to learn, and so many ways to improve herself. Humans weren't the only species that had room to grow and evolve.
Her hand had slipped off when Elly had recoiled after the impromptu embrace. To Nayru, sitting up now, moving her hand lazily in front of her as she stared at it, it was a reminder of what she had sworn to build. Perhaps she would be able to share that world with Elly some day - but her work would not be done in a day, or a decade, and it was entirely possible that it would take centuries, long beyond Elly's lifespan. There was still a great deal yet to do, and much that humanity would have to accomplish on its own as well. With what would her own hands be stained with by the time she had finished?
The manakete put her arm around Elly again, this time encircling the girl's shoulders in an awkward embrace. She couldn't say exactly why, but it seemed like the right thing to do; the little pega-sis was obviously not doing exceptionally well, and Nayru felt that she was much at fault for that. She couldn't truly empathize with the girl, not yet, and was further still from telling Elly the truth - but if she couldn't at least help one girl, how was she ever supposed to save the world from itself?
"I do not think I will ever forget it. Who would? Who could? To go from simply staring at the sky to finally being one with it, to dance through the endless ocean of stars, to fly ever closer to the sun itself. Seeing the world from a new perspective, the mountains and valleys and forests alike all sprawled out before you in an infinite tapestry of incomparable beauty, reminding you of what you protect."
She certainly hadn't been thinking nearly so coherently at the time, young and guileless as she had been then, but the incredible majesty and importance of the world around them had been impressed on her even then. "...Remember that, Elly. Don't fight just for the honor of your fellow pegasus riders, or for your ideals. Fight for the people you want to protect, for the world that gives you sustenance. Fight for something worth your time. Sometimes, the only difference between a monster and a man is what they fight for."
How easy it was to do something horrible in the name of your ideals, to fight for the wrong reasons, or for the wrong side. The Scouring would never have happened if men and dragons alike only fought to protect the world from those who would break it.
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Elly
Pegasus Knight
Rookie Squirrel!
Posts: 101
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Post by Elly on Dec 29, 2011 2:38:48 GMT -6
Elly grinned happily, the arm around her shoulders all the invitation she needed to move closer to the older woman. She relaxed, a feeling of contentment spreading through her body; how many times had the commander embraced each of them, especially on those first nights after they had been recruited, leaving their homes and families behind to join the wing? She listened avidly to Nayru's description, the words echoing with her own memories of her first flight, and every one after it.
"It's just so cool, right? I'd never felt so..." The young squire paused, floundering, searching her mind for a word, and for just a tiny moment, envied Nayru's complex, flowery vocabulary. "Happy? When y' feel like everything below is all tiny and it's just you and your partner and y' have all the sky for yourself, y'know?" She paused to catch her breath, her excitement getting the better of her as she continued to talk rapidly. "And, y'just feel all the wind blowing past and it's like you're weightless and can do anything or go anywhere and everything is all quiet and peaceful and exciting at the same time, right?"
She stopped, sighing dreamily. She really couldn't imagine a life without Heather, being shackled to the earth all the time. Her thoughts drifted to the remainder of Nayru's words, though, dampening her mood. "Y'know, I..." She started, her tone uncharacteristically serious. "I don't think I've ever thought about fighting? But, I..." Elly took a deep breath, a needle of sadness shooting through her chest as her mind wandered back to her previous thoughts, yet her tone hardened very slightly, the barest hint of determination hidden within her voice. "I don't wanna be a mercenary. I won't be, Nayru." The edge left her words as suddenly as it had come. "I don't...even if some of them are wrong..." Her voice grew softer, and Elly bowed her head, still troubled by the realization Nayru's words had brought about. "I wanna be a real knight, like the ones in the stories, like the commander, y'know, and help people in need, and keep them from being hurt, and...make them happier, maybe?"
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Post by Nayru Al-Saiduq on Dec 29, 2011 10:09:59 GMT -6
Nayru sat there, dully aware of the warmth that suffused them both, cutting through the chilly night air. Elly was already resting her head on the manakete's shoulder, quietly speaking, happy as a clam. Listening was something Nayru was very used to; not exactly a specialty of hers, per se, but by necessity a skill she had been given plenty of opportunities to practice while wandering the world recording stories. She was listening to Elly's words with much of her attention, but yet more of her was still lost in thought, as she had been for much of the day.
The conversation with Aerious earlier was still on her mind, but the situation she was in now dominated much of her consciousness, as well as the gradually growing realization that Elly didn't really have anyone who would listen to her. It wasn't exactly surprising, given the girl's propensity for never once shutting up - but Nayru felt an odd kinship there, all too aware of her own tendency to wax articulate when given the chance, and couldn't really bring herself to get annoyed at Elly's similar tendency. The girl felt lonely, too, as though far too much of her sense of self-worth came from pleasing the commander she kept talking about. Did she not have family? Friends?
Perhaps she could listen, for a time. The temperature was not unpleasant to her, nor was the darkness onerous, and there was a pleasant closeness that she found she liked. It reminded her of something similar, so many decades past.
She spoke to hold back those memories, to force herself to focus on the present. "There is a divinity to flight that is indescribable. The angels common to many religions - perhaps it is a simple representation of that innate longing that so many of them bear gossamer wings of purest alabaster, the holiest rendition of a desire so simple it cannot be tainted by human weakness." It was an unconscious, but intentional, decision to not respond immediately to Elly's concern about mercenaries. The girl's words stirred something in her, reminding Nayru of the conviction with which she had told Aerious that there were still humans worth nurturing in this world.
That she was holding one now seemed amusingly ironic.
Nayru let out a long sigh, mulling over her thoughts further. A small part of her wanted to tell the little pegasus trainee to go home, to live a happy life and not deal with the nightmares of combat. It was her own weakness, she knew, the very mindset she had sworn to Aerious did not represent her overall mindset. Humanity would learn nothing if they simply avoided the horrible truths and difficult decisions of life. "Elly, embarking down that path is a decision that will test your resolve to the limit. Amidst the horrors of war, the pressure of combat, the arduous decisions you will be forced to make - it takes incredible strength of will to cleave straight along that narrow path, to keep your humanity even as you end the lives of countless men and women."
She continued, her voice soft and thoughtful. "Sometimes it is better to let people fight their own battles. Not every tragedy can be solved with a lance or a blade, no matter how swift your arm or steady your aim. Sometimes all you can do is guide someone, whether with words or actions, as they struggle with their own inner demons, a struggle you cannot join. You cannot make everyone happy all of the time; there are far too many different perceptions, too many different priorities amongst people, to satisfy everyone."
"But - I dream of a world of heroes, Elly, a place where we can all live together in peace. A world in which the strong protect the weak, and in turn help the weak become strong. Heroes strong in mind, in body, in will - a world in which humans do not continue this self-destructive path, but rise to the challenge, rise to their place as guardians of this world. I am not strong enough to make that dream happen alone, but for each individual that bears that burden alongside me, my share of the burden becomes just a little bit lighter. It becomes no longer only my dream, but theirs as well."
"In this world I see, it is no longer my dream - it is everyone's dream, Elly. What a beautiful world such would be."
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Elly
Pegasus Knight
Rookie Squirrel!
Posts: 101
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Post by Elly on Dec 29, 2011 21:59:09 GMT -6
Elly felt her heart beat faster as Nayru wove her vision for the future before the young recruit's eyes, the speech candid and bright. The world she described was beautiful; a world where people would help each other, where there was no more fighting between countries or bandits terrorizing innocent villages. A world of heroes...did that mean she could be a heroine? The word felt almost...tangible, now, no longer an abstract ideal. An honor, and a responsibility, too; and yet, everyone would work towards that same objective together, to create a better world...sharing the burden, as Nayru had said.
The thought made her head spin; she had never dreamed of something so enormous, so gigantic in scope, and still couldn't fully grasp it. And yet, her young mind had already embraced the nearest comparison she could understand, the one constant she had carried for years. The knights from her Papa's stories came to life before her eyes, no longer characters in a story, but people in the beautiful world Nayru had briefly shown her. And alongside them, people of all kinds; not just pegasus riders, but wyverns, and the farmer couple from back home, who had helped her when she had scraped her knee once. Knights of other nations, all helping each other, working together. Everyone could be a knight!
She turned to face Nayru, her eyes wide. "I..." The young knight suddenly felt nervous; her mouth felt dry, and she found herself taking a deep breath. "I wanna be a heroine, Nayru! More than anything else! And if we all work together..." And yet...there was something dissonant, something she just couldn't accept from Nayru's words, a piece that didn't fit. "But...I wanna make a world where everyone can be happy. Not just some people, y'know?" She sighed; that had been the missing piece. It didn't matter if Nayru was right or not. Maybe it was too hard, way too hard, but...nothing was impossible, right? "I...I'll help you! Okay? Can I? Please, Nayru?" She held her breath for a few moments, before fidgeting, growing nervous. "I wanna share that dream, too!"
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