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Post by Deleted on Oct 24, 2015 16:07:48 GMT -6
[After Maelstrom's Clutches]
After that rather unusual ordeal, it at least felt good to Veigue that they were able to get a room in an inn. He really wanted to give his room to someone else who needed it more, but the survivors insisted he and Nayru had a proper place to rest after that battle. At the very least, they seemed determined to recover from the damages asap than to sit around, which was admirable. If only they had more time to spare, he'd help with reconstruction. But with the large scale damage that beast did, that'd take quite a while... and as much as he wanted to help, Veigue knew that other than the issue of time, he couldn't temporarily settle down somewhere when he knew there were certain people out there who still wanted his head, and he'd rather not invite even more turmoil upon this place.
...In fact, he nearly forgot about all of that. But Jaquio was the least of his worries at the moment. Quite the bit of time passed since he battled Zarius, and he did feel a bit more confident in fending off any assassin on his own at this point. But all that really did was just remind him that he still had quite the way to go. As he sat quietly at the foot of the bed and gazing out the window, this gave him the time he needed to reflect on everything without worry of everything else for now. Since his arm wasn't in true danger, he patched up the injury on his own to spare any healers' time. There were still a lot of injured people ten times worse off then he who were fortunate enough to still be alive, and while he wouldn't get the immediate recovery he desired, it just meant he had to wait a bit longer to train.
While he had the patience to wait, it still didn't stop him from feeling utterly disgusted in his progress, staring at his own hands for a couple of seconds before balling them both up, restraining the pent up rage he always refused and preferred not to let out. "...It still isn't enough!" He silently exclaimed to himself, though the tenseness gave his left arm a slight jolt in pain, forcing himself to return to a calm state in order to prevent reopening the wound. He'd just prolong his recovery at this rate, Veigue trying his best to just relax and stare at the scenery while indoors. He wanted to get out of this stuffy room, but it'd more than likely be for the best to just sit tight for now.
But this did at least give him another thing to do... reaching into his small bag of belongings as he grabbed the journal Lena wanted him to read. He had already read a good portion of it already, but he only had small times like this to read bits and pieces of it. Guess now was a better time than ever to get back to it and finish off another portion of reading on his father's personal thoughts, though he didn't continue it just yet, holding the journal firmly in between his hands as he attempted to dump his previous thoughts into the back of his mind to focus on reading, though not really doing a good job at it so far.
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Post by Nayru Al-Saiduq on Oct 25, 2015 7:04:37 GMT -6
For not the first time, Nayru wished she could actually live up to the infinite wisdom and eternal grace that the stereotype of dragons existed as. What she wouldn't give to always know the right answer to everything, or to be able to figure it out in a heartbeat if she didn't. To actually be the idealized woman she had impersonated for so long; wise, kind, beautiful, brave, strong, unflappable. A laundry list of positive traits, most of which she could barely even replicate in passing.
Yes, she had grown more comfortable in the last few months thanks to Veigue and Elly and Hayle and Remus and some of the other goofballs she'd run into, but for the most part she'd been trying to ignore the problems and continue on as if nothing was wrong. It was the easy way, to run from her past, but she had realized something during the chimera battle: that she couldn't keep doing that forever. Whoever... or whatever she was, there were just too many question marks, too many ways in which she was clearly different from most dragons, and not for the better. Normal dragons didn't struggle to control their own powers; they didn't go berserk when they transformed, they didn't fear themselves, they were more emotionally stable than her, and they sure as hell didn't have an unexplained link to the god damn Nether. They also didn't look at horrifying chimeric monstrosities and think to themselves "MAN THAT LOOKS FAMILIAR!"
That all said, it was likely that even all those things together would have been ignoreable for the foreseeable future if not for one more; running from her own power was no longer an option. Nayru didn't know that much about Divine Dragons and godlike powers, but she did know that changing the weather and massive lightning strikes from the sky were well beyond what she had known dragons were capable of, that freely manipulating one's powers even in human form was beyond the realm of possibility for most dragons, and she only knew one person who actually lived in that world - who couldn't even transform without bending the world around her. But that person had been able to control their power, had been everything that Nayru wanted to be now.
And so, after centuries of running, she had to reopen the pages of history she had tried to leave behind.
But it wasn't as simple as just heading off to another adventure anymore. Even if she could just ditch most of her existing responsibilities, there was one left that she couldn't. Veigue. Nayru continued to hesitate in front of his door, arm half raised as if to knock, but not actually doing so. The idea had been simple; show up, let him know she had to leave for a while, leave. At least that had been the plan. It was harder to do in practice.
It felt harder than pulling out her own teeth, but after a few more moments of weakness, Nayru forced herself to rap lightly on the door, alerting Veigue to her presence if he hadn't already sensed her standing there like a complete idiot. Sometimes it seemed like he had sharper senses than her. Swallowing her fear, the dragon spoke up, her voice quiet but penetrating. It looked like he was still awake, and she couldn't afford to put this off much longer. "Veigue, it's me."
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Post by Deleted on Oct 26, 2015 17:18:51 GMT -6
Veigue didn't make any immediate reactions when hearing Nayru come in, just now remembering that he only left his door partially open. He wasn't really expecting any visits what with everything going on outside and the aftermath of the battle, but it was of no concern. Thankfully, he didn't begin picking back up on the journal, and not like he was going to be able to focus on reading anyway since his mind was still somewhat clouded from thinking too much. He placed it aside for now, slightly turning his head to at least stare in the general direction of the door, seeing Nayru enter completely from the corner of his eye. Perhaps whatever Nayru wanted to talk about would help effectively push things back in his head, if only a little. Eh. He could only hope, anyways.
"Something up?" He immediately inquired in no specific tone in his voice, still not sure what she could have needed in order to stop by. Not that he had a problem with that, of course. While he didn't look at her directly, it was quite apparent that she either had something serious on her mind or just came to tell him something important, though didn't make eye contact out of his own form of respect and courtesy in order to not place pressure or anything. Remaining quiet for now to let her speak, he took hold of the sheathed Kenji while awaiting a response, getting into a more comfortable sitting at the foot of the bed as he laid the sword upon his shoulder, more or less at this point getting into his focused position and state of mind as he always felt comfort with the blade close to him like that.
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Post by Nayru Al-Saiduq on Oct 26, 2015 19:12:57 GMT -6
"Ah... hey there." She smiled gently at Veigue, a touch embarrassed. Again she thought about leaving, wanted to run the hell away like the coward she was, but consoled herself with the thought that by this point she was too far in to back out. Wait... that wasn't consoling. Heh. Well, whatever worked to keep her from acting like a complete dumbass, even if it took a bit of a low blow. Jeeze, if only she could be this good at manipulating people other than herself.
But outwardly she didn't really show any of that, slipping inside the room quietly at Veigue's acknowledgement. JESUS this was pathetic. You'd think she was there to either break off their relationship or declare eternal love by how big of a deal she was making about it in her head, when really she was just here to say hi, let him know she was going to take a small trip, and make sure he was alright. Perfectly normal stuff for a duo of adventurers who also had obligations elsewhere at times.
Then again, not much about her or Veigue was all that normal in the first place, was it?
"Just..." She trailed off, changing her mind mid-sentence. Social niceties weren't quite her thing, but she didn't want to start off by making everything about her. And besides, all bullshit about looking good aside, one of the primary reasons she came here WAS to see how her friend was feeling, so it only made sense to bring it up earlier rather than later; as a greeting rather than an afterthought. Veigue was pretty important to her after all. "How are you doing?"
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Post by Deleted on Oct 31, 2015 11:37:03 GMT -6
When she responded, Veigue raised his eyebrow for a short moment before turning his head to the side again, noticing her trailing off before speaking again. He wasn't sure what was going on with her, but it helped him confirm that she had something of importance to say. Not to mention she hadn't cracked any kind of joke or remark yet as her usual, knowing that was norm for her. He turned his gaze downward on his bandaged arm, wondering if she was talking about his injury. Well, most likely. It was only minor, and just another injury on his flesh that symbolized his recurring weakness. But when it came to the wound all by itself with none of his emotions making it feel worse, it was nothing but a baby scratch that just couldn't resist bleeding. The usual downsides of being born of a naturally fragile race, he supposed.
"I'll be fine with some rest. I've suffered wounds ten times worse than this one." That was certainly true, at least. He wouldn't be surprised if the first aid he administered mended the wound enough for him to work the arm hard again within a few days. It's way better than having a big one that nearly have your chest split open. Those were never fun, and surprised he even survived those.
"...You're not acting like your usual self though. Something's on your mind, yes?" He normally disliked diving into other's business when he reads too deeply into things, but given that she was acting strange and it was apparent she needed to speak, he didn't see any harm in inquiring about it this time. All he could offer was only words at this point, anyways. Something he was never good at from the beginning, but nonetheless, he could still support in ways other than helping with battle.
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Post by Nayru Al-Saiduq on Nov 3, 2015 20:29:22 GMT -6
"Hmm." Nayru wasn't entirely convinced, and her tone and raised eyebrow showed it pretty clearly, but she didn't push the subject of Veigue's injury further - if there was one thing she had learned in all her history of doing stupid stuff, pushing people too hard when they didn't want to deal with something was near the top of the list of 'how to ruin everything 101.' As taught by Nayru, the pre-eminent expert in her field of ruining everything. It had been a hard won degree, but she had repeatedly proven that she deserved it more than any of the mere plebs in her field... okay enough of that. As much fun as it was to belabor the point of just how much she sucked at people aside, that wasn't really going to help much of anything.
Veigue went for the jugular pretty quickly, showcasing that piercing insight that... sometimes she kinda wished he didn't have. "Y-yes, I, uh," was her articulate and reasoned response, the great and powerful and wise dragon a stammering mess of uncertainty as what little courage she had managed to build up dissipated like a fart in the wind. It was stupid and unseemly and she KNEW it, dammit, but she couldn't help it, Nayru was absolute garbage at talking about herself or revealing her DARK SECRETS even to people she trusted. It took a moment of waffling to get to the point where she could even blurt anything out, and that was pretty much entirely unplanned. "You remember the chimera?"
No, Nayru, the guy who was literally standing next to you when you started the fight and stuck around even after you turned into a giant lizard would totally just forgot he was there. "Uh, right. Well - I don't think it was a fluke." She was still having trouble getting out what she was trying to say, but it was getting a little less awkward as she went. Nayru closed the door behind her, paranoid of eavesdroppers, fishing out a small medallion from parts unknown. "I found this on it, and I... recognize the emblem, I think, or at least it looks familiar. More importantly, I believe the creature was created, rather than born, and not anywhere near these parts. I don't know if it was some long-forgotten laboratory or an escapee from the Nether, if it was malicious intent or just unfortunate circumstance, but something or someone set that creature loose to wreak havoc in Elibe."
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Post by Deleted on Nov 4, 2015 13:08:07 GMT -6
"An artificial creature...? I didn't even know that was possible." Well, he's heard of sorcery and all of that, but he doubt it had to be related to that. Regardless, his bigger concern out of that is why someone would want to create that thing? It seemed to be on an uncontrollable rampage, something that no person nor other beast could control it's actions. It could easily destroy the creator as well. Since normal monsters are just beginning to settle down in their home, having some idiot creating an even more powerful one wasn't something anyone needed right now, nor ever for that matter. They seemed to choose a rather turbulent time to pick up a career in hunting down monsters, it seemed. But this certainly complicated things, as Veigue deduced that this may be one of those things where there may be nothing that he could do about in assisting with these creatures' destruction.
...Assuming another crazy person makes another chimera. As he stared at the medallion, it was also something he's never seen before. Well... he's SEEN a normal medal before, but this one seemed rather unique. "...If that's true, then this'll turn into a bigger problem fast." He couldn't even put his finger on where the beast could have originated from. He wasn't aware of any other places out there that wasn't connected to Elibe, and if there was, why did it fly all the way over here first? Unless it had other means to get here by magic.
Nayru seemed more worried about it than he was, however. He wasn't really sure what all happened between her and the chimera since he wasn't up close in the fight aside from one moment, but since she mentioned recognizing the emblem, he suspected it was something only she knew or could understand. He didn't push it anymore, so he just pondered on things a bit. However, there wasn't much to go off of, as it seemed like at the moment, there was no clear conclusion to everything just yet.
But that was more or less the real problem there: Information. Answers wouldn't really fly by without some digging around first. "Well, what do you suppose we do? Try to research this medallion further? Seems like the only thing I can think of at the moment. Finding out more about it first could link you to more information on how that creature came into existence, and hopefully find the person responsible."
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Post by Nayru Al-Saiduq on Nov 4, 2015 16:07:09 GMT -6
"Well, I don't think it's an immediate concern... the creature was aimless in its savagery, lost to its own rage; I would guess that its release was either random chance or related to Hargus's recent widescale use of dark magic. We should keep an eye out for repeat issues regardless, but if we don't figure it out now, the world won't end tomorrow." She could be wrong of course, Nayru was acutely aware of that fact, but she really hadn't gotten the feeling that this was part of some grand conspiracy by an evil villain. There was no apparent goal, no particularly important targets in the area that the creature had ravaged; it had been deadly, sure, but rampaging through mostly lightly inhabited areas with no military or strategic significance whatsoever.
There was the possibility that had been intentional - a low-stress test of new hardware so to speak - but without further information, Nayru didn't really want to make too many assumptions. She was more concerned about the past-tense implications and what that meant for her. "Yes, I would like to research it. The creature was far too large and powerful to have been hidden anywhere accessible, so I suspect it as either housed somewhere deep underground, in a location only recently brought to light, or possibly brought here directly between a tear in the film between our world and the Nether." Which was... exactly why she was worried... and part of the problem linking it to her. "In either scenario, there are likely traces to be found, and I believe that with some effort I can track it down."
"But... there's something else I need to do first." There was hardly even an attempt to hide the hesitation in her words, she'd kinda given that up as a lost cause, but she tried to push onwards nonetheless. "My... transformation back there... forced me to acknowledge what I've always known; that there is something very wrong with my existence. I suspect," she continued, her expression as serious as nuclear winter, "that my origins are as unnatural as that creature's, and possibly linked, in the strange sense of kinship I felt for it. And now that I finally have full access to my power... you saw what my transformation wrought there. Half of Bern could see the skies crumble. I no longer have the luxury of running from my past; I need answers, and I know of but one who could offer them."
"Veigue... I have to go back to Arcadia."
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Post by Deleted on Nov 4, 2015 22:29:35 GMT -6
"Hm..." Well, guess that all amounted to just them not really knowing what truly could be going on. There seemed to be a lot more going on behind the scenes on this continent. Many hidden mysteries and the like that have only just begun to reveal themselves. Some good, while others completely bad. When embarking on his journey almost a decade ago, he wouldn't have ever predicted that problems would stretch far beyond what could be considered the norm for what humans were capable of handling. He found that the longer he traveled this road, the more complicated things became. Of course, he'd never waver from the goal he set those years back, but it would have been nice to have at least one thing that was simple enough to solve.
But that was the irony of things as well. As much as the residents of this world liked to the claim the land for themselves, they've yet to realize the true depths of Elibe. From the moment he met Nayru to present day, he learned a lot more of the unknown than he did before. Things that the public are too weak at heart to know or accept. As such, this only proved to motivate him more to try and make a difference, while trying to at least maintain that silly promise he made to Lena as a child.
Leaving those thoughts alone for now though, he listened carefully as Nayru explained more in detail of her troubles. While not being able to put himself in her shoes, he at least understood the frustration of her situation. One that he could relate to a certain degree. But hearing her saying that she had to return to where she came, it seemed to be a lot more serious than Nayru was letting on. Of course, he wasn't going to pry out of knowing his place, and it wasn't like she was forced to stay by his side or anything. She was free to do or go wherever she pleased. He wanted to help, but today was a reminder that he wasn't very capable of helping anyone if he could barely help himself.
"I see. Well, if you feel going back will help you with the answers you seek, then do what you must. I don't see a problem with that. When there's a chance to find answers, it must be seized by whatever means. I'm not sure if going back will be a dangerous journey or not for you, but whether or not it's physical danger, I'd like to accompany you in order to assist. But..." He knew all too well that he couldn't fake that he was this all-powerful master of sword with great intellect, so Veigue was well aware that he had to be completely honest with himself first before trying to give someone else assistance. Looking out the window as he held Kenji a little closer, he had a rather conflicted frown plastered on his face. "...I'd just get in the way. In my current state, I'm not capable of helping anyone or anything. I'll just be a burden as always. So, don't let me hold you back from seeking out what you need. I'll be fine on my own."
...He knew that he needed more power. And he wasn't going to stop until he achieved it. So as much as he wanted to go, he knew that he couldn't. Not to mention that he also had some unfinished business to attend to. He didn't want his bad ties with Jaquio and this mysterious person his father warned him about interfering with anything, so it was also probably for the best if he stayed behind and handled that himself. He may not have been strong enough handle the unknown, but he at least knew that his own personal trials were something he was capable of overcoming.
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Post by Nayru Al-Saiduq on Nov 5, 2015 1:01:22 GMT -6
"Okay, hold on." Nayru spoke with all seriousness, dropping the melodramatic bullshit of a moment before to address Veigue directly. There was no anger in her words, but she was belatedly realizing that apparently she had missed something serious, and she was a touch angry at herself. "What's this all about?" As subtle as always; ever a master of the direct approach, Nayru was a little lost when it came to subtlety sometimes, especially about important things. And for better or for worse, Veigue was... important to her. More than anyone else. He was the closest thing she had to a friend, her partner, and they shared a pretty serious promise together. For all her power and gradually growing contacts, the dragon relied on him a great deal, emotionally in particular but also as comrade and partner in arms.
So needless to say, she wasn't... mad at him, exactly, but the way Veigue was talking, Nayru was almost panicking a bit at the thought that he saw things differently. She didn't have many friends, and she didn't want to lose her best one without ever realizing it until it was too late. "We're partners, Veigue." She leaned up against the wall, determined to not go anywhere until they worked this out; she didn't really understand what the problem was, but Nayru would be damned before she let things end on that note. "You saved my life back there with the chimera, you're one of the strongest human warriors I've ever seen, and you've survived things that most wouldn't."
She crossed her arms, almost defying him to disagree. It wasn't often that Nayru was especially forceful with people, terrified of alienating them, but while she wasn't thinking clearly about it, unconsciously she was terrified of losing this. "...And you're also my best friend, who's helped me... more than you can ever know." That admission came out a little quieter than the rest - not that she'd been shouting, but her words had been strong and full of conviction before, whereas that sentence was almost meek, reserved, in keeping with how much more difficult it had been to actually admit for her. If she had been thinking about what she was saying, Nayru might not have said it at all. Not because it wasn't true, but because she was ultimately... really bad at being honest with people, and worse at being honest with herself.
"So no, I'm not going anywhere when you're like this. There aren't many people alive, human or dragon, who could match you in mental or martial strength. We literally just killed maybe the... second worst thing Bern has ever seen after Hargus, we're god damn heroes around these parts. So what's gotten into you?"
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Post by Deleted on Jun 6, 2016 12:57:20 GMT -6
Nayru's responses entered his mind; a clear pathway within his mental world allowing her words passage into the deep roots of his brain. He processed and paid sharp attention to her, but opted for silence. He did get where she was coming from, but he felt that she was missing the bigger picture that Veigue himself was only capable of seeing. She wouldn't understand unless he outright told her — easier said than done.
But the right words began to surface, albeit slowly. With each moment passing and having a clear idea of what wanted to drop his lips, his arms moved before his mouth could. An insane idea of reinforcing the point he was soon to make sprung to mind, but his mood wasn't the best, and he didn't care much for the consequences, since it'd only affect him and no one else. The repressed emotions of anger and disappointment towards himself didn't have to be expressed fully, but his actions could speak them better than poorly chosen words.
With his mind set, Veigue raised Kenji in front of him; it's as if he were ready to whip out the steel against an opponent in front of him. Except, only thing that stood in front of his general direction was a mirror — not satisfied with the reflection of himself that he witnessed. Despite this, it's symbolic to what went through the swordmaster's head, slowly unsheathing the blade before resting the edge on his forearm and jerking downward.
The pain of torn flesh wasn't foreign to him; he's felt it too many times to grunt in pain. Not like it was a deep inflicted wound, but just enough to make him bleed a tad — tiny drips of crimson hitting the floor slowly.
"Power and intellect aren't the only determining factors of success..." His voice was deeper; both reflecting on his mood and physical pain.
Still was a crazy idea to hurt himself, but Veigue had to address that as quick as he could. He remained sitting during the entire act, inching closer to the edge of the bed while his eyes fixed on the edge of his family blade; eyes that showed the vast emotions of inadequacy and desire that coursed through his busy mind.
"This body of mine has been through hell and back, sure, but the experiences and knowledge gained along the way doesn't change one simple fact: it's because I'm human that my usefulness is limited." His voice raised, but he didn't allow all of his pent up anger towards himself to escape, all in order to make it clear to Nayru that he wasn't mad at her.
"I may be strong now; I may have finally surpassed my father and achieved noteworthy feats, but past achievements don't mean anything if you're still not the best you can aspire to," He said. "And I'm simply not in the best position I need to be in right now. You may not have realized it, but in that battle back there, that beast slugged me around like it's play-thing; I was only able to save you due to a phenomenon with myself that I've yet to understand — I didn't even know how I did that, and still don't."
Veigue rested his arms; shoulders dropping as a silent sigh escaped him. "How can I keep it up, knowing that I merely lucked out instead of being in control over my own actions? We won't be that fortunate next time. Power and intelligence is one thing, but refinement and control are just as important; those two I've yet to master."
Despite the forearm injury, Veigue sheathed his sword. That cut wasn't serious, so he'd nearly forgotten about it already. All that coursed through his mind was the desire to further push himself to the next level.
"...Do you understand now?" His tone was lower, though not weak. More like he accepted his shortcomings. "I can't be comfortable with where I am now until I go back out there and confront my newfound weaknesses; training my way through these natural limitations require discipline to the body that I've yet to experience. In my present state, enemies like that chimera will stop me from helping you the way I should, until I discover these latent powers and utilize them at will..."
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Post by Nayru Al-Saiduq on Jun 7, 2016 1:59:55 GMT -6
"Veigue, what the hell-"
Nayru's surprise was evident in her troubled tones, as was the moment of horror at watching him cut himself, but it was the overwhelming sense of deja vu that stopped her reaction dead in its tracks. She remember another idiot who had cut themselves on Veigue's family blade, right in front of their partner, with no warning to allow the other to stop them. It would be pure hypocrisy of her to yell at him for it - but what else could she do? The tightness in her chest wouldn't go away, her emotions no longer as dangerously explosive as they had once been but still unstable.
Was this - what it was like to care for someone as much as yourself? Nayru bit her lip, felt the tenseness of her muscles, but could only stand there as she listened to Veigue's explanation. She didn't even know if she was mad, whether at him or herself, only that the ugly feeling of helplessness was still there.
It did serve to make Veigue's point, though, perhaps even better than his words did, even if she didn't want to admit it. The reminder that the small island of happiness she had found so recently could still be torn away from her in an unlucky instant was no less poignant. Immortality in a world that would love nothing more than to 'fix' it was a funny thing. She had drifted for so long, unable to make attachments, that she had nearly forgotten what it was like to truly feel the loss. Oh, she certainly felt bad about people dying, but there had always been a sort of disconnect there; it was sad and unfortunate and horrible, but it was possible to rationalize away. They were only human, it was simply a fact of life, it would have happened sooner or later. Callous and cruel from one perspective, but from another it was a necessary viewpoint for one's mind to endure so much loss.
Nayru carried the weight of her own victims, but in a way it had always been selfish, self-centered; what their loss had done to HER. Had she... done something similar to Veigue? Staring down at her upwards palm, the dragon numbly opened and closed her hand, a meaningless act for no good reason she could think of, perhaps only to give herself something to focus on. She had been aware that Veigue wanted to get stronger, to be something more than he saw himself as, but she hadn't understood quite how deeply buried it had been in him, how desperate he was, and how he felt about being protected.
It was ironic, really, because in his position she would have felt much the same - but given her nature, her existence, it had been so long since she had been forced to rely on anyone that it was almost unfamiliar with the concept. Yes, she had been slowly learning to rely on Veigue a little, but her war had always been one against her own power, not her lack thereof. In the wake of finally making a breakthrough, not total domination but a great victory nonetheless, Nayru had sort of just assumed that things were going well. And Veigue was right, she hadn't really noticed what he was doing in the battle against the chimera. She was too focused on the fight itself, on her own condition, to really pay attention to Veigue. Even if it was all to protect him.
So it wasn't anger, not really. A bit at herself, and maybe a little at Veigue for not telling her sooner, but nothing serious - she couldn't judge him for doing what she would have. Instead, it was disappointment. Not in Veigue, for any of his weaknesses or failures, but in herself; for not noticing, for not knowing, for not helping him more along the way. As much as she would love to pretend to be a wise and omniscient being, and as much as one might expect from something more than five centuries old... she wasn't really good at relationships, huh?
"Usefulness, huh?"
"Hahhh..." It wasn't really much of a laugh, more of a deep exhalation as Nayru wrestled with that word. It wasn't funny at all, and yet she still wanted to laugh. Usefulness. It sounded a lot like another one she knew pretty well from experience: weapon. A rationalization of existence that could also be described as pragmatic fatalism. She didn't like it. The mindset was all too familiar to her, the belief that all she was good for was killing, that there was nothing else for her in Elibe. The idea that as long as she surrendered herself to something else, the responsibility would not be as strongly hers. It was a sickly sweet syrup that coated the throat and dulled the mind, wrapped in pleasant promises of perfection.
"...You know, Veigue," the dragon said, her words calm and even to the point that it almost made her turbulent emotions boiling below their surface all the more obvious. "When we met, I had come to think of myself as a weapon." Nayru looked up at him, silently grateful that she could embark on these experiences of emotion safely now thanks in no small part to Veigue, though controlling the surges was another story entirely. "I was tired of running, tired of hiding. Rather than face my past, I only wanted to forget it."
"Given a few more years, I think I might have given in entirely." Not up. In. She didn't clarify, but the implications were there if Veigue cared to sift through them. She had thought, more than once, of joining some country or another; promising power in return for safety, fighting for them if needed, knowing that she was being used if only for the illusion of a place to belong. The idea of being responsible for helping plunge Elibe into war by disturbing the power balance had helped keep the idea at bay, but it and others darker still had always been there. It was discomforting to think of how close she had been. A few years to her perspective was nothing. "But I didn't. Because of you."
"I get what you're saying about strengthening yourself," Nayru continued, "-But I don't want to see you go down the path of just trying to be useful to others. It doesn't have a happy ending, and you deserve better." Maybe words themselves were like liquid courage to her, or perhaps speaking her mind so plainly was empowering enough in itself, but nonetheless Nayru bucked the crushing self-loathing and introspection that would usually take over right around now. The first step was the hardest, and she didn't really know what the hell she was doing anyways, but she slowly started walking towards Veigue as she spoke. "You don't have to be 'useful' to me, but I'm not saying you need to forget getting stronger, either. I have a lot of growing to do, too, so I can actually use my power without having to worry about hurting those around me."
Nayru was vaguely aware that she held more raw power than most of the dragons she'd met by now, but it was the control she had seen in Arcadia that had eluded her even still, the ability to do simple tasks like using enhanced senses naturally or breathe her element without damaging herself or even transforming without causing untold devastation that she lacked. Sure, it wasn't the same problem as Veigue, but in the end they had the same goal - they both needed refinement and control. She could probably stand to nail on some extra intelligence too, but that was a bit of a lost cause by this point.
"So yeah, I understand." It wasn't her style to beat around the bush, anyways, so the dragon just took his last question head on. "You have a lot of training to do. We'll run into more enemies like that chimera if we keep going as we have. The secrets of my past, the skeletons of yours, and the darkness consuming Elibe - there may be things there that make that battle look like a prelude." She was standing in front of him now, no longer conflicted but still hesitant. Had she known all along, or just decided? Well, it's not like planning was really her strong suite, nor were speeches.
So Nayru impulsively bent over and hugged him, wrapping her arms around her friend. "-But you're not alone. We're in this together, Veigue, like it or not." Her body shook with a quiet giggle for a moment. It actually sounded kinda threatening when she worded it that way. "So don't stress it. We'll make it through this."
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Post by Deleted on Jun 10, 2016 13:09:45 GMT -6
Was being useful mostly what it boiled down to? Veigue began to realize just how scrambled his situation was. The more Nayru offered her support, the more angles were granted for him to look at and attack the problem from. A large pool of feelings mixed with confusion; the issue had multiple causes, yet multiple solutions. So while what she said was true, there were also other perspectives he had to view it from to understand his true potential.
He wanted to say more, but Nayru didn't need to bother with all the intricacies with the issue in full volume. A cruel reality that the way he thinks and feels can't be entirely comprehended by others but himself. She, nor anyone else in Elibe for that matter, couldn't merge their brains together in a literal sense and solve each other's woes in one fell swoop. He was just appreciative that she understood in the sense of what was most important, which offered him insight into seeing his goal from different views.
That didn't mean the sacaean was entirely comfortable with himself. What other form of training has he not engaged in that would aid him? With that in mind, the journey of discovering everything about himself didn't become any easier. Countless years of being cast into others' shadows and forced to ignore his struggle — as well as his own growth — only served to separate Veigue from himself as time coursed through.
Well, no more.
Despite the difficulty, the first step was acceptance; that a change was required. Drifting from those shadows and finding his own was the first step of achieving that task of reaching a milestone that most humankind wouldn't dare try to climb to. Uneasiness about the upcoming journey continued to keep him wrapped in it's web despite the resolve, causing him to sit in a cold, weakened state where he sat. It's almost as if he entered a trance and his surroundings blurred as result.
But Nayru's sudden embrace and followed up words snapped him out of that detrimental state. His memory somewhat lapsed of what happened before she came closer, feeling that the emotional state of his mind wasn't as knit together as believed to be. Mind blackouts were never fun, but Veigue felt glad that it was only short-lived. He still genuinely felt Nayru's devotion — he remained appreciative that she continued on the endless ride to hell with him that Veigue unwillingly drove himself into.
He inclined to move both arms to return the hug, but...
Yeah, pretty sure she wouldn't appreciate a bloody mess of a bleeding left arm on her clothes, so he just settled for the righty as he leaned himself closer.
"Thank you," was all he could say, trying to acknowledge all that she said to him in a simple expression. Being lost in his desire for achieving greater heights left him in a wrecked mental state that he refused to allow show. Instead, he opted for just resting his chin on her shoulder, scrambled for words as a lone tear fell down his cheek. Sort of glad on the inside that their field of vision was in opposite directions for that moment.
"There's one quick thing I have to do before progressing any further," He said after regaining his composure; searching through the maze of his mind for more appropriate words. "I need to go back home, too. However, for a different reason I can't explain well..."
Of course, Nayru might have thought he was crazy, wanting to return to that village he's no longer allowed to enter, but he had to stop that train of thought before it could form.
"Not back inside the village itself, but home — back to my parents' resting place. Something's trying to tell me to go back there."
A lot of it probably had to deal with him almost finishing his father's journal, and not being particularly fond of what he discovered during the final entries. Maybe his father's spirit was trying to guide him towards some sort of realization about what he read and it'd be more clear if he went back? Veigue wouldn't know unless he allowed that premonition to guide his way.
"Perhaps that's another reason why I might not be able to go with you back to Arcadia," He said. "I wanted to hold off on visiting them for later and just continue to aid you now, but something or someone that I can't see is whispering in my ear, telling me that if I don't go back there now, something horrible that I can't prevent is going to happen. It's incredibly vague that even I don't understand it... No pun intended."
For all he knew, it might have related to his sister's survival. Based off what he discovered in his father's journal, Lena's life was in more potential danger than his own. Really, it'd been that way for a while, just that he's been oblivious until now. But that spiritual warning he received could involve either Lena, himself or others, like Nayru...
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Post by Nayru Al-Saiduq on Jun 25, 2016 13:10:08 GMT -6
Home...? It was probably for the best that Veigue explained almost immediately, Nayru's confusion written on her face as she pulled away from their hug, trying not to make it awkward, and tried to understand quite what he meant but easing quickly due to his efforts. She still didn't quite understand what he was saying, exactly, last time she checked hearing voices was bad. Because she was in SUCH a good place to judge, what with having an evil alternate self that she had fought an internal death match with while her / their shared body - she was still a little confused about that - rampaged and tried to kill Veigue. Or the time that the voice had helped her unlock her power somewhat more safely. Yeah... it was probably for the best she hadn't explained that part to Veigue or he'd think she was crazy. Crazier. Whatever.
But Veigue's goals, and the situation, was more important than her own rambling - both internally and with her life. It had been a long and arduous journey for her, but by now Nayru trusted Veigue more than she was actually cognizant of, perhaps more than either of them realized, so she took it at face value nonetheless. It didn't really matter if she got everything from his veigue, err, vague explanation; she believed in him nonetheless. If he said he needed to do it - it simply had to be done, whether or not it was convenient.
The funny thing is that she wasn't sure if she was more proud of him or a feling a little left out, though both were accurate. In some ways, their mutual adventuring in the last week or so, mostly while trying to find information, had led to a number of events for both of them. She had run into Remus and had that battle against the gargoyles, for example, and her little argument with Hektor, and a dozen other things; clearly Veigue had been busy as well.
On one hand, she was happy for him to be getting things done and coming to terms with his past, things she had mostly been avoiding, but on the other hand it did feel a little bit like he was almost - growing up without her or something. It was weird, and she kinda understood that it was probably incredibly petty and goofy considering that it wasn't like he was just going to leave forever tomorrow, but it was still there, so there wasn't much point in pretending it wasn't.
At the same time, inserting herself into EVERYTHING he did wasn't necessarily the wisest idea. People needed their personal space sometimes. Nayru wasn't the brightest tool in the shed about some things, a trait she was thoroughly aware of these days, but it would have been hard for even HER to live that long and not pick up some inkling of the various basics of interaction, even if she had surprisingly little experience with them on a personal level. The dragon bit her lip pensively, unconsciously, as she heard Veigue's explanation out and divided her attention between that and her thoughts.
She didn't have the luxury of eternity to figure out her existence, Nayru knew. She'd been running from it for centuries now, steadfastly refusing to mature or deal with her actions, and now that she'd finally managed to take a good look at the tapestry she'd woven, it was simply not something she could continue to ignore. Put off a bit, maybe - she wasn't going to explode tomorrow - but there was no guarantee that further issues wouldn't resurface over time. And frankly, after her last power spike, Nayru was feeling a bit intimidated by herself, as lame as that sounded. Not by how awesome she was, but holy crap what kind of mouthbreathing retard would give a dumbass like HER that kind of power, and how did she not blow up an orphanage or something accidentally with it?
So needless to say, Arcadia was non-negotiable, whether she liked it or not. But at the same time, it didn't have to be today or tomorrow. So... "...Veigue..." The pause following it betrayed her hesitation, Nayru never exactly a master of her own emotions or to some degree expressions. She really had no idea if this was all a good idea or not, only that it was the only one she could think of. "If you want to deal with this problem of yours, I'll understand." It would hurt, but she would. Nayru knew better than anyone how strong the urge to solve her problems herself was - but she also knew how much harm it had done over the years. "Just don't forget that you don't have to deal with it alone."
The brunette-slightly-missing-having-silver-hair smiled awkwardly at Veigue, aiming for the 'understanding wise woman' look but ending up somewhere between 'overeager buddy' and 'spaghetti everywhere.' "After all we've been through, one more crisis with your dad's evil ghost or crazed assassins or Elly trying to help can't be that bad, right?"
What could possibly go wrong?
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Post by Deleted on Jul 1, 2016 15:08:17 GMT -6
As Veigue listened, it didn't fail to dawn on him that he actually had a willingly helpful hand in what was to come. Gratitude for that was as long overdue as the smile he failed to return. He knew that deep down, Nayru would try help him out with any sort of threatening obstacle; even vice versa held true towards him. That's what ironically worried him the most; no matter the danger, the other's going to help.
Perhaps if their situations were reversed and he wasn't as informed about the contents of the information within his father's written records, he wouldn't think too much on the potential danger of the issue and just tagged along to help handle it. He had a strong feeling that's close to Nayru's view point. Veigue's hand reached for his father's closed and bookmarked journal — not like he was going to continue it right then and there. That'd be silly, just opening it up to get lost in a notebook of dysfunction while Nayru was still standing there. She'd have thought he finally lost what remained of his functional brain.
The swordsman opted for taking a firm hold of the journal and standing to his feet, nodding to Nayru before pacing towards the opened window. A gesture to let her know he wasn't ignoring what she said. His gaze met the outside activity; the locals keeping at their work to recover from the chimera's wrath, but still had nice scenery to lock eyes with to put his mind at further ease.
"This... problem is more complicated than everything else that's transpired," Veigue said, still keeping his sights out in the window. However, he couldn't help but allow a silent chuckle escape him. "You're stubborn, so I know that no matter what I say, your mind's set on helping out anyway. As such, I'm not saying you can't come with me, just that I want you to keep something in mind."
His hand clutched his father's journal with a bit more of a stronger grip than a mere hold. The conversation with his father's spirit finally making a lot of sense the more he recalled the contents of his past. The thoughts raced, but Veigue knew that he hadn't read enough of it to come to some final conclusion, or even speak of it aloud. Nayru was more or less still confused on what he explained earlier. Anything else specific about his upcoming journey would just make the confusion even worse.
"Everything that's happened so far — from the very beginning to present — leads up to this. My father couldn't handle it; my grandfather couldn't handle it. Compared to Jaquio and his lackeys, this potential threat makes them look like child's play." Kenji still remained in the other hand, Veigue feeling some of the magic warm up as he's grown accustomed to it reacting to his feelings. "What I'm saying is, if you're set on getting involved, don't take this obstacle as lightly as the others. Your life will be in as much danger as my own, so promise me you'll be careful."
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