Chitaru Nagito (Complete)

[Chitaru]

Name: Chitaru Nagito

Class: Hunter

Age: 16

Born in: In a village to the east of Taras called Dinare

Appearance:

 

A lite bit sort for his age, with a careless red hair and, almost every time distant, brown eyes, wearing a shirt of blue and white (it broke because a little "accident" and being his favorite one... this happen), brown pants and black boots.

Personality: "See to believe" define he, stubborn as hell, bit of a liar. Loves run and be faster than others, buy things for less and help his little sister. Hates being fooled and milk. Has fear to blood and wolfs. Is good chef and he enjoy cooking.

Story:
Chitaru's family has monetary problems, he and his dad Samus made job after job for money when they need it, when Chitaru was thirteen years old Samus was logging wood in the forest and Chitaru was with him, Samus let a tree fall and after it hits the floor they heard scream of someone calling for help, they run to help it thinking that it were hurt for the tree, and when they did, they found three sacaen's surrounded by twenty wolf, Samus told Chitaru to go back and then he ran to battle, Chitaru stay were he was trying to see how he can help, a man whit a sword in hand was fighting, a woman was in the floor whit his legs under the tree and unconscious, and a child trying to help the woman, Chitaru run to help them influenced for the stories about his mom, when he approach the woman she was being atack by one of the wolf, they were all full of blood and Chitaru could see how the limbs of the woman were ripped by the wolf, the girl ran to Chitaru and Samus tell him to escape whit the girl, Chitaru look at him, Samus was all full of blood and after see that Chitaru ran whit the girl to were the carriage was, hearing screams of fury and pain they enter the carriage and hide under a old cloth, Chitaru was crying whit fear of what happen with them and his dad, the girl saw him crying and hug him to make him fell better, Chitaru hug she back and they waited for their fate until they were asleep.
When Chitaru wake up he was in his bed whit the girl in the shop, he went out of his room and found Samus siting on a chair, he was exhausted
-"Were are the others?" ask Chitaru,
-"The-..we will take care of the kid while the- Samus try to say,
-"Dead isn't it?".
-"... The name of the girl is Cecilia",
-"...",
-"What will have happen if the tree wouldn't have fallen?",
-"...",
-"...".

The years pass and Chitaru could see how others treated Cecilia only for her hair color and how she can't defend herself, and he won't go out of Dinare anymore,
"The people only fights for themselves and lie every time, they are arrogant and enjoy whit the pain of those unfamiliar to them" is whats he think now.

The shop was all made off wood, the table and the crates were full of weapons and vulnerary, there were only four doors: two form the bedrooms were in one wall, between them was resting a rapier hanging on the wall with the letters F.I. in the handle; in the wall at the left was the door form the storage room and at the wall in front of the rooms doors was the front door.
the place was empty aside for Chitaru and his sister Cecilia, she was playing in a corner whit a ball while Chitaru was "resting his eyes" and sitting on a chair behind the table.
To kill the quietness the door was open whit a kick, Chitaru fall of the chair and Cecilia try not laugh as a man with red hair and an axe enter, Chitaru got up and say -"WHO THE HELL TH..."-"Chi! you won't believe the deer i kill, he was a giant" say the man, " -Dad?... liar, Chitaru think -"Anyway take a bow and some arrows is time for you to learn how to hunt" -"WHAT? i won't, and who is going to take care of Cecily?", his dad leave the axe aside and walk to him , Chitaru tried to resist but at the end his dad take him by the hand before taking a bow and then drag him out of the shop -"Cecily has ten and i learn how to hunt at your age and you will too", and Cecilia remained there watching how his brother was dragged out, -"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO".

Family:

*Samus Naigto: A Warrior, he exaggerates things and is a bit brute but a good man, loves hunt and have a shop, Chitaru's dad who he loves no matter what, age 36.

*Freya Iceborn: Chitaru's mom, a sacaen and ex-sell sword, died in Chitaru birth.

*Cecilia Naigto: Adopted sister of Chitaru, nicknamed Cecily, she is mute, age 10

[Saturos Prox]

First off, it's "with" not "whit". Your sentence structure could also use a bit of work. That being said, I'm going to venture a guess and assume that english isn't your first language. No worries, you're not the first.

Also, is his sister's name Cecyl, Cecilia, or Cecily?

Now in regards to the actual meat of the profile, tell me more about Chitaru's life.
-What does he do for fun? Does he have any interesting skill?
-Why is he so cynical at the age of 16? Did something happen to him when he was young?
-What about his dad? Why does Chitaru think his father is lying when he comes in the door? Does his father lie alot? Does Chitaru like his father?
-Why doesn't Chitaru want to learn how to hunt? Is he lazy? Does he not like hunting?

What you have is a good start, but I'd like to see a little more to flesh out the character.

[Chitaru]

You are right, is Cecilia but nicknamed Cecily, and done i think

[Richter Abend]

Works for me