Song of Shadow and Fire 2 [Drei and Mila B]

[Drei]

he had a task. A goal. An objective. If he focused on that...he might be able to continue toning everything else out. That..was all he could hope for at-least. The snowy haired shaman walked slowly up the dirt path leading through the territory in Santaruz, tugging the reigns of the white Etrurian horse which had been his only consistent companion through out the past few weeks. He'd met a few interesting people sure..but they came and went not unlike spring storms. Quickly, and while memorable, brief. Duma. A swordsman of interesting curiosities and a generally kind demeanor who had a knack for helping people based on what Drei had seen. Mila, a female mage who had a rather odd curiosity and dislike for dark places..or underground dark places? He couldn't be too sure. She had a fascination with magic that fit a mage well, and was pretty nice. Even if his first impression of her was when she launched fire balls at him. Samantha. Another female mage who was very talkative but equally friendly. Someone he'd shared a camp-fire with the day before a battle in Sacae that led to him meeting Mila.

Though a few other interesting people had also bumped into him, none of them had remained a constant. Which..was fairly consistent with the theme of his life at that point. The shaman lifted a hand to brush through the messy, slightly disheveled ashen locks of hair which looked like a horrid case of bed head. This, sadly was not the case. If anything..he hadn't known the concept of sleep for two days. The lingering burning within his eyes made this even more evident. Not that it'd change anything.

His head hurt. It was a headache similar to one he'd gotten when eating too much ice from Ilia, but worse and constant. Right behind his forehead. It was all he could do at times to keep from buckling his knees when the headaches kicked in. With a palm pressed to the side of his temple, the ragged shaman trudged onward. Evening had set in, yet he hadn't considered setting up camp yet.

The notion finally dawned on him only when he noticed the camp-fire flickering in the distance. Déjà vu slipped into his mind, as he paused to look towards the distinguished sight. The orange light of the camp-fire stood out far more in the violet hues of dusk. It took a few minutes before he even got within sight to observe the camp site. He felt the dull throbbing of the inner pain start to develop more. Still..it was manageable. By the time though, that weary feet ceased at the edge of light which ringed out from the camp fire, Drei felt so weary and sore that he was on the verge of collapse.

It was easy to stand thanks to the pale steed near him though, and as he shifted his weight to lean on it, he felt the sweet relief of the added support from the horse who continued to gaze around idly. He spoke up, his tone a tad bit raspy sounding. Not from using his voice too much however...but from barely using it. Since he'd parted from Bern, he'd been in almost completely silence. No one was around to hold conversations, and he wasn't the type to strike up one on his own unless the circumstances called for it.

"Excuse me...Can you by chance spare room at your fire? Ah..um...Hello Mila..It's me. Drei."

Perhaps it was the already abysmal mood he was in. Part of Drei wouldn't have been surprised if the Mage had forgotten him. Though he could scarce believe the coincidence in encountering her, his emotional state was far too drained to prompt much reaction beyond a half-hearted smile towards the woman in greeting as he continued to lean against his horse.

[Mila]

Mila wast starting to make her way away from Lycia. Away from the troubles and dangers that seemed to follow her. She had made a small campfire made out for herself in order to help sooth her nerves for the night. She was making some tea to help deal with her own nerves. It had been a few days since her last proper good night's rest so now she was back into the habit of waking up with nightmares and being forced to watch her back. The mage heard foot steps approaching she quickly grabbed her tome and prepared to have a fire ball ready. But she stopped when she head a raspy voice call out to her and the figure slowly emerged out of the shadows.

"Drei? Drei!" She was both glad and relieved to see him.

"Yes come, sit by the fire you.." As he approached she could tell how ragged he was. It tugged at her emotions to know that the poor shaman was suffering in a similar manner as she was.

"My gods what happened? You.. look like you've gone through hell." It was odd she head heard this line before a few days ago from another one of her friends. She sighed softly and poured some more water into the tea pot. She had a good knowledge of herbal tea blends and their curative properties. Perhaps one of them would help him deal with whatever it was he was visibly going through. And to be honest she welcomed the extra set of eyes to help deal with the night watch.

[Drei]

A weak smile worked unto his visage for the briefest of moments. He took a moment to nod in acceptance of her offer, and show thanks before he shifted his weight forwards and swayed off of the support offered from resting against the horse. His left foot shakily caught the ground ahead as he stepped forwards before lowering himself with a somewhat heavy impact. Amber hued eyes slowly drew up to her as he tried to dismissively wave the attempted question of concern. He instinctively diverted his hands however as his body pulsed with pain. It was as if the pain had a heart-beat, and each throb inflicted further agony of increasing severity upon him. The same searing headache, as if resting at the center of his forehead.

The boy's palms rubbed at his temples wearily while he hissed, an attempt to speak instantly cut off. The pain was almost temporarily crippling, and scattered his thoughts, as he tried to maintain himself and conceal the pained expression that wanted to bleed out. Though his body quivered once, he mustered his resolve and quelled the unsightly reaction to the pain by toughing through it. He lifted a hand to run through the messy ashen locks while he looked up at Mila briefly. His other hand lingered near his temple, slowly rubbing in a revolving pattern as he tried to deflect the question. Genuine concern took a bit of a priority as he noticed her own state. While she looked nice, as per her usual, (if the few encounters they had could constitute a norm or standard) she certainly looked a similar manner to himself. The young shaman plied her with questions.

"Are you okay Mila? You don't look very well."

His eyes eased shut, as the stinging began to broil up once more. He did his best to ignore it for a time, and opened an eye to keep his gaze lingering upon her. The orange light dancing about from the camp fire cast shadows to the ground on the right, and those dancing flames offered not comfort; they offered a morbid sensation that roused within him. One he did not like, and was not accustomed to.

[Mila]

"Me? Well to be honest you should have seen me a few days ago. I looked worse. But.. you.. look like you are in pain." She slowly got up and helped ease him down to sit down by the fire. She made him a small pillow using the cloak she carried on her person.

"Here.. make yourself comfortable. I'll get started on some tea for pain. Perhaps one to sooth nerves." She smiled softly. There was a clear look of concerned on her tired face. It was strange. For a moment she wondered if this is how Ryu felt when she showed on up on his door step. She shook her head and got to work on the tea. She pulled out from her bag various herbs and a filter for them. Slowly she put the roots and contents into the filter and threw it into the tea pot. Soon the two of them would have tea to share. The mage was grateful she restocked on her tea's and supplies before leaving Santaruz.

"I.. will be honest I am relieved to see you. I.. really needed an extra set of eyes to help witht he watch. But I guess that will have to be done by your horse. I'm going to make sure you at least try to get some rest." Gah.. what happened to you. She had a small frown.

"What happened? Are you ill?" She had to ask. She needed a bit more information before she could take the next steps into helping him. I suddenly wish I had a heal staff.

[Drei]

He couldn't tell at this point what was more constant. The beating of his heart, or the equally rhythmic throbs of pain pulsing within his mind. Though the boy's single open amber hued eye followed her motions as she moved to implement the makeshift pillow, he tried to maintain a standard gaze after a few passing seconds. He couldn't help but wonder how much worse off she had been. Drei tugged at his knee's and hugged them a bit as he leaned slightly against the pillow she'd used her cloak to make. He didn't fully rest upon it, but it was a start. Drei looked up and watched as she moved about before lowering his head, and speaking in a quiet tone. The red around his eyes and slight blood-shot nature was more from lack of sleep than the actual pain, but the duality the true cause ultimately.

"I...can help keep watch. I haven't slept in a few days. I don't see why tonight..ngh..."

To avoid showing an expression contorted in pain, he was cut off by dipping his head down. It seemed as if every time he tried to recall their faces, he felt the pain grow worse. He groaned briefly as his body trembled in that small pose, his forehead brushed to his knees as he shivered. He looked up after a moment before speaking in the raspy tone.

"I..don't think I will sleep. I'll help watch. I..haven't felt well is all."

Did he tell her? Wouldn't it seem crazy? How exactly did you tell someone that your brain magically hurt you when ever you tried to remember things? How often did you reveal that it was nothing but unwavering harm. He shook his head a bit, initially to clear the thoughts but also to free himself of the lingering doubts. Buckling once more under a sudden jolt of agony he tucked his head into his knees once more. His sanity was starting to wear thin. How much longer could he endure? Could he ever? Would it end? His heart hammered in his chest as he panted a bit, shaking his head and looking up to Mila with a weak smile.

"I'm glad your better...atleast a bit, if what you say is any indication. "

[Mila]

From his answered, actions, and appearance Mila had deduced he was at least sick in some way. Ahhh... he is sick. She forgot all about her own troubles and was now focused on Drei. Now the task was trying to figure out where he was hurting from and work to relieve that. If she weren't in a half paniced state she probably would have applauded herself for this new attitude to nursing. What is it? Is it stomach aches? Fever? headaches? Chills? Sore throat? Come on Drei talk to me here.

"Forget about me, focus on you! Where does it hurt? Is it your throat? Your head? I.. can't help relieve you with out knowing what's wrong. Is.. it magic related?" She asked with a mix of worry and curiosity in her voice. She was about to talk some more but she was interrupted by the sounds of the whistling tea pot. She turned her head to the cook ware and spoke at it.

"Oooh.. Shush you!" She pulled herself away from the young shaman's side and went to grab two mugs. In the bottom of the mugs she put in a little fresh thyme and one sugar cube in each. She grabbed a thick rag and carefully took the hot pot off of the fire and set it down near the mugs. Carefully she poured the tea into the mugs. The light colored liquid slowly gained a slight green color as the sugar cube dissolved and the Thyme was blanched.

"H..here.. the tea is ready. Let me help you back up." She slowly eased the bright haired shaman up off the floor. She pressed the warm wooden mug into his hand gently.

"It's really hot. Ah.. I've got other remedies for pain I could always mix into the tea. I could mix honey and lemon to deal with the throat.. or some chamomile to help with the sleep.. some bitter root to deal with fever.." Oh you poor thing. If I could i'd take your pains. She was trying to calm herself down. She took a seat right by the shaman in case if he swayed and fell over.

"If you feel dizzy just lean on me."

[Drei]

The more that Mila started to fuss over him, the more Drei hesitantly concluded it might be best to tell her. He shifted and slowly clasped his hands around the wooden cup that she offered. If anything..the warmth was distinct. That was something he could focus on. Slowly he fixated on it, and tried to dwell on the feeling of intense warm contrasting to the chill of his pale skin. He adjusted his body, and rested upwards with his back lightly against her left shoulder. Ashen strands obscured the amber eyes which focused on that tea. He shook his head initially to fend off the blistering pain that throbbed so readily. Closing his eyes, he spoke in a slightly pained tone. He..hated having to rely on another. This should've been his burden to bear. Not Mila's.


"My head...it...it hurts so bad. I..It's hard to think. I..can't sleep. Sometimes, it's too much."

Over-exertion had taken a toll. Like the shaman had once said to another. Elder Magic was costly. The more one took, the more it took. Drei had taken more than he should have. Every thought met with a clouded haze as he used the tea to warm his hands. Bringing it to his lips, he sipped at it in the smallest of draughts, lightly blowing to cool it. Twin beads of sweat traced down the bridge of his nose as he tried to focus on the small aspects. Though dizziness did indeed perpetuate around his being, he was able to stave it off by concentrating on the fixed center of the small tea cup. It would be his only true saving grace.

Technically one of two saving graces. Had he not bumped into Mila, at this moment he'd have likely been a crumpled mess upon the ground. He gazed skywards for a moment. A tremble seizing him before he winced in discomfort once more. The boy drew his gaze to the woman that had poured him tea before speaking in a quieter tone. Despite this, he couldn't suppress the bitter self-loathing that spiraled about for his inability to maintain composure.

"Mila I.."

He paused. He tried to take slower breaths. Deeper ones. Ease his hearts pounding. He shivered again.

"I can't remember them. It hurts..and I'm confused. I don't know what's going on. I can't sleep..I can't..I can't."

His coherence was hindered by the reiterated statement as he started losing cognitive thought again and suffered a second round of the pulsing ache which plagued him. His knuckles whitened, as he gripped the cup tightly and let out a groan; a soft whimper of discomfort following while he inhaled deeply to muster himself. His self-loathing merely grew as the visibility of his poor state became more obvious.

[Mila]

She waited for him to finish the tea before pulling Drei to her shoulder. She wasn't sure what to do so she did what her mother would do whenever she felt sick. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and put her chin on his head. Her mother at this point would have started to sing a lullaby of some sort. Mila knew her singing voice was terrible so she just opted to keep him close. She didn't understand what he meant by remember them. But she did understand what it felt like to be in pain and to be with out sleep. The more he quivered in pain the more she wanted to hold him closer.

"Ah.. I'm sorry Drei. I'm so sorry. I wish I could heal you instantly like a talented healer.." She closed her eyes. The wind passed by them as she tried to think of something.

"..I.. don't know what is going on. B..but if you are confused.. I.. maybe.. talking it out. Start slowly with what you know. Something... simple first. Your name? The horses name? What.. ..what.. started this? Take your time. It's alright.. I'm here. I'm here." I'll help you. Drei's horse gave a small snort.

"Er... we're here. As your loyal steed so gracefully reminded me." She did her best to calm herself down. The mage pushed back her own headache and frustrations. She needed to be strong for Drei. Eventually she let go of his shoulders and went to prepare something else. Something for the nerves. I'm going to need it.

[Drei]

As the female mage tugged Drei's body to her, he offered little resistance. His body was partially limp even. As he felt her wrap her arms around his shoulders, he felt a shiver run down his back. Though her body was soft and warm, he couldn't seem to maintain any warmth. It almost felt as though it constantly fled him, leaving him in the shivering state he lingered within. Ashen hair brushed the girl's chin and cheek as he tried to focus on her words. He concentrated, able to at-least produce enough thought to acknowledge what she had said.

Perhaps she was right. Focus on the small memories. Say what he could remember. Was it crazy? Absolutely. Then again..he was in unimaginable pain every time he attempted to remember a specific aspect of his past, so all bets were off. The young shaman panted a bit as he tried to quell the hammering heartbeats that kept him in even more distress than he already was. He slowly sifted through his memory.

"I...know my name. I know what I look like. I...know where..I'm from. I know my parent's names. I..GAH!"

Though the outcry was sudden, he hissed in pain and bit his tongue, somewhat literally, to silence himself as he fell onto his side, writhing in pain along the grassy surface. His robes were enough of a cushion that he didn't really harm himself in this act, but with both palms raised to his temples and him clutching at either side of his head, it wasn't an obvious concern of his; getting hurt by rolling around on the ground. Small droplets trailed down the corners of either cheek as the pain angrily frothed outwards. Like boiling water it burned and raced along his entire being. The suddenness of it completely caught him off guard.

A few moments passed before his body began to still it's self. The small turnings and tossing of pain ceased, and he was left laying upon his right side with arms crumbled with one upon the other and his fingers close enough to graze his shin. He spoke quietly after a brief silence, his voice now somewhat more raspy.

I can't..I can't see them. I can't remember. Mila..I can't see them.

[Mila]

The mage's eyes widened at Drei's sudden outcry of pain. Even as she was busy making another batch of tea for him to drink she was mentally checking off the symptoms he was showing. And putting what little bit of herb or powdered root she knew would help. What disturbed her the most so far was that when she embraced him he felt cold. Too cold for her liking. She had enough water in her canteen to make one more batch of tea for the both of them. But she was going to have to give him both her cups. Whatever this was affected Drei strongly. If anything it was stronger then her mild sleep deprivation and nervous state.

"Okay.. it's alright. Don't force it. The lack of memory is triggering a pain.. don't force yourself to remember it. You can slowly grasp at it later.. when.. your body has had time to recover. Maybe after some sleep. I know I was a wreck for a week before I got help from a friend." She wasn't going to go into details about what kind of help. That was a conversation for.. well that wasn't a exactly a casual topic of conversation. She shook her head. She was forced to lift the pot of tea a bit higher then usual so as to let some of the powders simmer gently in the tea broth rather then boil. She would have to keep this up for about ten minutes. Ten long agonizing minutes of her being forced to watch as her friend suffered.

"Just.. please.. don't.. force yourself more pain." I don't think I can watch.

[Drei]

It was beyond words. No words he could muster could describe the pain, as the boy instinctively tried feverishly to recall what was locked to him. Mental barriers blocked his efforts as he vainly attempted to mentally conjure up the images of his parents smiling at him, or gazing at him, or any expression. Each attempt induced further bolts that pierced every fiber of his being with ruthless equality as to his entire being becoming subject to the turmoil. As if cold hands were ripping at him from within, and tearing parts of him away. That he heard Mila telling him to stop was but the grace of luck it's self, with his attention drawn inwards and retreated so reclusively.

The tremors slowed. His body began to grow still. Perfectly still. He panted, rasping dogged breaths as a single outstretched hand clawed feebly at the soft soil and grass he lay on. He slowly drew himself up, with beads of sweat cascading down his temples and towards his chin. His hair, though matted to his forehead and face from perspiration, was like a visor that hid his downcast gaze as he looked down at the ground in agony. He groaned and slowly started to move onto all fours, shakily, but steadily. Part of him felt hollow. Violated. Something had been taken from him. Something precious. He knew not by who. He knew not how, but something he would never have misplaced had been robbed of him. This anguish manifested in the tears that slowly trailed down the bridge of his nose, falling in mixture with the beads of sweat that fell from his chin. His heart still raced, but at a slower pace than moments before. The pain subsided from an agonizing fire that branded his very soul to a hurtful throb. A dull buzzing that slowly eroded his fortitude, but was manageable compared to the horror he'd just felt.

He spoke in a voice barely above a whisper. Breathless in tone, as he tried to choke back the veritable storm of emotions both locked up from so long ago now, and recent; it threatened to overwhelm him. ""My parents...Mila, I can't remember them. I can...but I can't see them. He struggled as he spoke. That he would attempt to subconsciously and trigger another pain filled bout, he feared greatly. He tried to instead focus on emptying his mind. A blank canvas. A shadowy cover of pure silence. He had to, for his sanity's sake.

[Mila]

There were tears forming in the corner of the mage’s eyes as she watched Drei. She watched as he squirmed, shuddered, and then he went still. Dead still. He was breathing so very hard. And yet the mage could do nothing but watch and try to keep her now trembling hands steady. So that the tea wouldn’t fall and cause a hot mess everywhere.

“Drei? Drei!” She called out to him, during his stillness. Her voice a mix of panic and fear. She could feel her heart sink down into the pit of her stomach, when he didn’t respond. She held her breath, so she could hear the shaman’s ragged breathing. It was the only confirmation she had that tied the light haired man to life. Her heart was racing and she breathed a small sigh of relief when he started to stir. At this point she could slowly pull herself away from the fire, lower her arms, and bring the teapot gently to the floor.

He spoke about his parents at how he could and at the same time could not remember them. What? She didn’t understand. She could understand not seeing them, she knew it was impossible to re-see the dead. Unless they became zombies. She shuddered lightly at the dark thought. Carefully she put half a sugar cube into the bottom of the mug and gently poured tea into it. She slowly approached Drei and pushed the warm mug into his hands once more. She got on her knees in front of him so she could be face to face with him. She could get a good look at his face now. Gah.. those poor blood shot eyes. His hands are so cold.

“H..here.. the tea. It’s more bitter then the last one. But it will help with the tremors and pain.”

[Drei]

His hands moved shakily. Slowly he cupped both palms around the small tea cup and brought it to his lips. The churning hot steam from the liquid spiraled upwards, adding a source of heat to his face and giving a brief vibrancy to everything around him. His eyes focused on the cup steadily as it blurred in and out of the shaman's concentrated gaze, before he tilted the cup and drank slowly from the hot tea. She was right. It tasted a bit more bitter than usual. That was okay though, because the splitting headache he was suffering from seemed to dwarf all other discomforts. The shaman tilted his gaze as he sipped further from the tea, looking to Mila slowly as he drank. There was a small pause, before Drei felt the pain in his head start to lessen steadily. It did not vanish entirely, not dissipate; however it become far more bearable.

What had moments ago been an almost maddening ache of his entire body that took origin behind his forehead, was a painfully annoying tweak coming from his head. His whole body did not ache, and he was able to actually focus and think. Though a minor change, color flushed somewhat back to his face. Pale skin took a brief darkened hue as the young boy slowly sipped more of his tea. His lack of sleep wouldn't be mended by the tea, but at-least he could, for the moment, relax somewhat. At-least this pain was plausibly one he could shoulder without fear. The snowy haired shaman looked up to Mila once more as he spoke quietly, his voice raspy and somewhat shot but still understandable. His amber eyes lingered upon her. "I..it feels better. Thank you Mila. ...I think I'll be okay for now. Er...better..atleast. "

[Mila]

The mage nodded slightly before moving back to her spot by the fire. She noticed a small bit of color come back to his face and the tremors had stopped. That put her in some ease. Curiosity wanted to know why he was experiencing these things. But she opted not to ask, lest she force another wave of pain. Mila sat still with her back pressed to a nearby rock. She was breathing deeply in an attempt to calm herself. Drei's actions startled her greatly and she felt regret at not being able to fully cure him. Try as she might to calm herself she could feel her body trembling, warm tears made their way down her cheeks and landed on the ground below.

She tried to wipe them away with her hands. The shamans illness had shaken her more then she liked to admit. I pray that you sleep soon. It would give us both some peace of mind. It took the mage some time but she managed calm herself.

"... I.. don't want to trigger you more pain. So.. I will not ask what happened. But... The night is really quiet. So I.. guess I'll ask. Wh..where have you been?" She tried to keep herself composed.

"I was in Santaruz until recently. Got involved in something. But a friend helped to resolve it.. sort of." She scratched the back of her head.

"I'm sorry. That wasn't very descriptive. I.. just. Th..that was scary, Drei. Real scary. Your shaking... Then going still.. and your breathing. I.. thought.. I was going to lose you right then and there." Now, I wish I had saved myself some lighter tea.

[Drei]

He was exhausted. As he gazed to Mila, his vision was a haze. His eyes were unfocused and he couldn't adequately describe the burning pain that burned away at his eyes. The weariness ate away at him steadily, but not enough to fully deter him. He wearily lifted himself, shaky still as he stood up and trudged over to her before plopping down next to Mila. He was sore, and he was weary...yet a subconscious paranoia filled him with a primal panic that the headaches would start again. The fact it had happened multiple times? He couldn't really adequately rest without panicking wildly. With his head slowly lowering and nestled against her shoulder as he hid his face to the crook of her neck before mumbling, now slightly delirious.

"I went through Bern. Fought some bandits, a town burned down...came to Lycia and then this happened. That about sums it up. I..ah...oh and I hid away at an Inn in Santaruz. A few people didn't like seeing a shaman and tried to hound me..so stuck to coming out late at night. Otherwise nothing really."

There was this lingering sentiment that he feared. The notion of being forgotten. Of forgetting. His most recent trial had him grasping helplessly into the wispy depths of memory for something precious that he couldn't recover. How did one recover from that? When the most private and personally important treasures could idly be taken, while helpless to retaliate or recover them? It was a truly haunting notion, and he was quick to shuffle it aside, lest he feel reemerging horrors and pain surface. A single amber eye cracked open from his spot resting on her shoulder as he gazed up to Mila. The fact that she was crying startled him. In his state that he was in, he couldn't exactly connect all the dots. His eye widened in shock before he slowly lifted his head. Shifting the cup into one of his hands he slowly reached up with a somewhat cold pale thumb to brush away the tear sliding down her cheek.

He tilted his head before managing a weak smile and clasping the tea cup in both hands. There was a faint resolve. He didn't know if it was his fault he'd seen her cry. If his weakness brought it about, when he was in his fit of pain. That'd have to stop though.

"Don't worry though..It's getting better already. Ah..it's not unbearable anymore to hurt see? I'm sure I'll heal up..eventually. Yes?"